The Sohmas Go To America!
by rockangel160
Summary: It's summer time, and the Sohmas, and Tohru, are going to spend it on a cross country tour of America! What happens when Akito finds out? 0 0 Come along as they travel to the U.S.A where they will discover a variety of different cultures!
1. Chapter 1

It was as normal as a day could possibly be for Shigure's household. Kyo, Yuki, and Tohru were sitting at the dinner table eating the dinner that Tohru had prepared for them. It was the beginning of summer break, and the three teenagers had several weeks to do absolutely nothing. What more could someone ask for? Shigure strolled in about an hour late for dinner.

"Daddy's home, kiddies!" Shigure shouted as he walked through the door.

"Oh, good afternoon, Shigure, I made dinner, but I think its a little cold right now, but I can make something fresh if…" Tohru greeted in her usual way.

"That won't be necessary, Tohru. It's my own fault for coming in late." Shigure interrupted.

"Why are you so late anyway?" Yuki asked.

"I had to go to the airport to pick up _these_." Shigure said as he flashed a handful of plane tickets.

"Plane tickets? For what?" Kyo asked.

"They're obviously admission onto a plane, stupid cat." Yuki said.

"I know that, you damn rat! I mean _where _are they for." Kyo said.

"Alright, I'll tell you. Drum roll, please!" Shigure said in a singsong voice.

"Just quit stalling and tell us!" Yuki and Kyo said in unison.

"Fine, we are going to…The United States of AMERICA!" Shigure cheered as little balls of confetti popped out of nowhere.

"America? Hm…I did a project on that country. It sounds like a very interesting country to visit." Yuki said.

"Isn't that the country where all the fat people are?" Kyo said.

"Now, Kyo, every country has people of all shapes and sizes." Shigure said wagging his finger at Kyo.

"Wait, Shigure, there are _four_ tickets here." Tohru said counting the tickets in his hands.

"Indeed, Tohru. We could not possibly go halfway across the world without you!" Shigure said smiling.

"Eh?! Oh, um, that's very thoughtful but I couldn't possibly go halfway across the _world_ I mean the house who will take care of it and you've already given me plenty I mean I live here and you provide what I need and I've already accepted too much and I know tickets are very expensive I mean I probably couldn't buy one on my own if I worked six jobs and worked every hour of every day and to accept one right now without doing anything…" Tohru rambled on for about another half-hour. The boys could have stopped her at any moment, but they just thought her rambling was too darn cute that no one bothered to stop her.

"…and I'm not worthy of such a privilege. " She finished, completely out of breath.

"It's alright, Tohru. It's a little gift from us, just because we care. Besides, we couldn't possibly have fun without you there." Yuki said as if speaking with shimmering purple eyes.

"Um, well…" Tohru's cheeks turned red.

"Yeah, and it's too dangerous for you to stay here on your own. We wouldn't want you to get hurt or anything." Kyo said trying to resist the urge to brush her cheek.

"Oh, ok, if you insist. I guess I'll go, if that's really what you want." Tohru said blushing.

"Wonderful! I'll pack your bags! Tomorrow we meet everyone at the airport and set off for the land of free and the home of the brave!" Shigure cheered as he pranced around the table.

"What do you mean 'meet everyone'?" Kyo asked. Shigure stopped prancing for a second.

"Oh, that's right! I forgot to tell you! All the other zodiac members are coming with us! Well, expect for Kureno and Akito. Unfortunately, Akito hates traveling, and Kureno…well that practically goes without saying." Shigure explained.

Tohru suddenly got very excited. It would be wonderful to go on a trip with the entire family! Yuki was relieved that Akito wasn't going. He might actually have air to breathe in America. As far as Kyo was concerned, he instantly thought of Kagura. Shoot! She would follow him everywhere! Hmm, but America is a big country; maybe he could separate from her at one point and get lost in a crowd.

* * *

The next morning, everyone left for the airport with all their bags packed to meet the rest of the family. Tohru told Arisa and Saki about the trip, and she promised to get souvenirs for them. She was ecstatic when she saw Rin sitting near the window in her leather boots and usual low-cut top. Although Rin probably wouldn't admit it, she was Tohru's friend. Both of them were striving to reach a certain goal, to break the family curse. Rin had tried on her own, but it only ended up in disaster. She might actually need Tohru's help, because every Sherlock Holmes needs his (or her) Watson.

That aside, that was not their focus here. Right now, they were trying to relax, especially Rin. She came because 1) Haru was coming and 2) it was a break from Akito.

Hatori had come because he could not possibly let everyone travel across the world with Shigure and Ayame as their "responsible adult guardians". Hiro came because Kisa was going. Now that our grouchy people have their reasons, it is safe to assume that our cheerful and nice people came because it would be fun.

As everyone boarded the plane, Kagura cheerily said,

"I read a book about American history! They had a long fight for independence in their Revolutionary War! It's a free country where you can do practically whatever you want!" Kagura broke the ice on the plane.

"Are you excited, Hiro?" Kisa asked to her cousin who sat next to her on the plane.

"Well, not really. I'm not entirely excited about visiting the country that bombed us to smithereens twice, and killed millions of our own people." Hiro said like the smartass he was.

"Hey, all is fair in love and war, Hiro. When you're fighting a war, it's perfectly fair to bomb other countries especially if you're trying to end World War II." Shigure rebuddled.

"Doesn't America get into wars frequently?" Yuki joined the discussion.

"Yeah, like every decade, and they practically win every time." Haru added.

"Actually, that's not true. The United States didn't win when they withdrew from the Vietnam War in 1973." Hatori argued. Suddenly, Momiji and Kyo jerked around in their seats.

"What's wrong, Kyo?" Tohru asked concerned.

"Huh? Oh, nothing. It's just I got this funny feeling. Like… I should _like_ Vietnam." Kyo answered.

"Yeah, I got the same feeling, except it's telling me I _shouldn't_ like Vietnam." Momiji said shivering in his seat.

"Oh, all this talk of war is making me so emotional! If it were MY decision, I take all weapons and throw them into the dark depths of the ever-expanding space-time continuum never to be seen AGAIN! THEN THE WORLD WOULD BE HAPPY AND WORSHIP ME IN ALL MY GLORY AND ACHIEVEMENT!!" Ayame gave his speech for every creature hundreds of miles above the ground.

"Ah! I'm sorry! I'm SORRY! All this time I couldn't bring ONE interesting thing to say into this conversation because I was so stupid as to head onto a plane for America without thinking of even stopping at the library to check out a book on the country's HISTORY! PLEASE FORGIVE ME AMERICA! I DON'T EVEN DESERVE TO SET ONE FOOT ON YOUR GROUND!! I SHOULD JUST JUMP OFF THIS PLANE RIGHT NOW AND RID EVERYONE OF THEIR TROUBLES!" Ritsu shouted as Kisa and Hiro restrained him for opening the emergency exit.

"Shut up, shut up, just shut UP! Do they have to scream so loudly? I swear sometimes I just wanna…" Rin said as she rubbed her temples at all the noise. Haru put his arm around her.

"Don't worry; we'll have a good time in America. I hear they don't care about what you wear, as long as you don't walk around naked. Even so, _those_ people go hang out at special colonies." Haru said to calm down her nerves. Rin sighed. That did make her feel a little better, because she really didn't plan on covering herself up for any reason.

* * *

A/N: TRIVIA Q! Who knows why Kyo felt good and Momiji felt bad about Vietnam? I want to see how many people browse Wikipedia day and night like I do!


	2. Day 1 Arrival and Arrangements

A/N: As far as couples go, I'm trying to go with the canon couples. You'll see Haru/Rin in this chapter as well as in others.

* * *

After several hours on the longest flight the Sohmas and Tohru had ever been on in their entire life, they landed in Los Angeles, California, of the United States, their first destination. It was a good thing that everyone had taken English in school, or else talking to people would have been very difficult. As soon as they stepped off the plane, they gave a sigh of relief and stretched. It had been a _long_ trip.

"So, now that we're here, what do we have to do first?" Kagura asked.

"Well, first we have to exchange our yen into U.S dollars." Hatori answered. Everybody walked over to the exchanging table.

"Good heavens! Is _that_ how much we get? I feel like I'm being robbed!" Shigure exclaimed when he saw the exchange rate from yen to dollars. It appeared to be _thousands_ of dollars less than what he got on the plane with.

"Ah! But look on the bright side, Shigure! Everything here is MUCH cheaper! Look! I found these sunglasses here for only 7 dollars! 7 dollars!! Can you believe that?!" Ayame shouted as he put on a big pair of pink, glittery shades. After exchanging the money, they went to pick up rental cars. They got two vans that could each hold 7 people. Since Shigure didn't have a license, Ayame and Hatori were the drivers since they were the oldest. Then came picking who would go in whose vehicles. Kyo and Yuki led Tohru with them to Hatori's car for their own safety.

"Oh, I'm going with Kyo!" Kagura cheered.

"And I'm going with Tohru!" Momiji shouted.

"Um, I think I'll go with Hatori also…" Ritsu stuttered.

"Wah! Does no one want to go with me?!" Ayame whined.

"Don't worry, Aaya! I shall travel with you! And I'll take shotgun right next to you!" Shigure said swooping in as he and Ayame embraced.

"Oh, thank you, Shigure! It's wonderful to know that someone is willing to experience my beautiful art form of driving!" Ayame said with fake tears.

"Ah! I'm SORRY! I OFFENDED AYAME BY TAKING HATORI'S LAST SPOT!! I'M SORRY!! I'LL GO WITH YOU AYAME IF IT WILL MAKE YOU HAPPY! I DON'T EVEN DESERVE TO SIT IN A SEAT!! I'LL RIDE IN THE TRUNK!" Ritsu freaked out.

"No, that's quite alright, Ritsu. I'll be delighted to ride with Haru, Rin, Kisa and Hiro!" Ayame tried to calm Ritsu down. Rin and Hiro groaned. As they walked outside to the rentals, the family gazed upon the streets and buildings of America.

"Wow! Look at all the space! It's almost like I could run around and not have to worry about running into anybody!" Momiji exclaimed as he skipped around on the L.A cement. As they got into the car, Kyo opened the side door and headed for the back.

"Honestly, you stupid cat, I never thought you would be so inconsiderate as to claim your spot with asking Ms. Honda where she wants to sit first. That's very selfish of you." Yuki said putting his hands on his hips.

"Hey I-! I just thought she would want shotgun, that's all!" Kyo said trying to shoot back his embarrassment.

"Eh? Oh, that's ok! I'm fine sitting anywhere! Besides, I think Ritsu already took shotgun…"

"I'M SORRY! I DIDN'T EVEN THINK OF ASKING TOHRU IF SHE WANTED SHOTGUN AND NOW SHE HAS TO SIT SOMEWHERE ELSE BECAUSE I WAS SELFISH ENOUGH TO ASSERT MYSELF TO SHOTGUN!! I'M SORRY, TOHRU!! PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!" Ritsu shouted.

"Eh? That's alright, Ritsu! It's n-no trouble at all! I-I-I like riding in the backseat. Please, don't worry about me." Tohru stuttered as she placed herself in the seat next to Kyo.

"Well, I guess I should sit in the backseat too in order to make sure Kyo doesn't do anything improper to Ms. Honda." Yuki said.

"HEY! What's that's supposed to mean?! I wouldn't even touch Tohru! Wait, I mean…" Kyo tried to defend himself.

"Not even _he_ can comprehend what he's saying. How pathetic." Yuki commented.

"Not even an hour into America, and they're already going at it." Hatori said to his reflection in the rear view mirror.

"Kyo! I want to sit in the back with you, too!" Kagura said as she tried to squeeze herself in.

"Kagura, there's…only…room for three here!" Kyo struggled to say as he was being squished against the side of the car.

"Alright! I'll sit in the middle row in front of you!" Kagura leaped into the next available seat.

"Yay! I get to sit by the window!" Momiji cheered as he took the last seat. As Momiji closed his door, Hatori started the car and began driving.

"Hatori, where are we going next?" Tohru ask.

"We're all going to this American restaurant called _Luby's_ for dinner." Hatori explained. Yuki looked out the window to see Ayame's rental car right next to them. He saw his brother and Shigure singing along to some radio song, Haru and Rin just chilling in the back seat, and Kisa cuddling next to Hiro, who was just making gestures to look like he was being hung.

As they got to the restaurant, they poured in and saw that it was arranged like a school cafeteria. They got in line with their trays and waited.

"So, are you going to eat anything, Rin?" Haru asked.

"Ugh, I feel like I want to gag. I can't eat this stuff, especially not in front of all these people!" Rin commented as she got her place in line.

"Oh, the fish sounds nice." Kisa said quietly.

"I think I'll get a chicken leg." Hiro said.

"Um, but, what about…" Kisa tried to remember the rooster's name.

"Who? Kureno? It's not like he's here. Besides, when's the next time someone will have the chance to rat out on me to _him_?" Hiro said as he got his plate of chicken.

"Oooo, spaghetti! I want lots of spaghetti! And mashed potatoes! Pie! They got pie here!" Momiji ordered eagerly.

"Spaghetti? That sounds good; I think I'll get that, too." Tohru said.

"Do they have any rice balls here?" Kagura asked.

"No, but they have rice. You could make it in the shape of a ball with your hands, though." Shigure answered.

"But how weird would that look? We don't want to draw attention to ourselves that much." Hatori said after ordering broccoli and cheese soup.

"Very true, Hari. However, losing the attention of these lovely Americans will be a challenge since Ayame is here with us." Shigure responded as he ordered chicken.

"I'll have a fruit salad! You know I found this health guide in one of my magazines, I don't remember which one. I think it was the Super Special Fashion one…anyway, it said that each fruit is capable of giving people a special quality. Like strawberries represent exotic beauty that flows beyond the Caribbean, and apples are for unlimited amounts of passion…" Ayame just went on and on to the lady that was serving him.

"I'll just have the…blackened tilapia, please." Yuki ordered sighing at his older brother.

"And I'll have the fried fish." Kyo ordered.

"I'll have a baked potato." Haru ordered. Rin said nothing, until something on frozen section caught her eye. It was the only food she could tolerate, gelatin. She put a bowl of red jell-o on her tray and ordered nothing else. Haru smiled when he saw that Rin had found her favorite food here.

When everyone sat down to eat, Rin took her Jell-O and went to a table at the corner of the room and sat down facing the wall. Haru picked up his dinner and followed her towards the table. When she finished her red Jell-O, Haru gave her the blue Jell-O that he had gotten.

After dinner, it was time for everyone to go to the hotel. The hotel they had was booked except for three rooms, which the Sohmas and Tohru would use.

"Ok, everyone, there are only three rooms, so we will have to divide ourselves into groups. Hatori, Ayame, Ritsu and I will share a room; the rest of you will have to decide who sleeps with whom." Shigure announced

"Did you have to word it that way?" Hatori rolled his eyes.

"Tohru! Let's share a room, okay?!" Momiji said jumping up and down.

"Um, ok but who else will we bunk with?" Tohru said.

"Kyo and I will share a room with you guys!" Kagura said pulling Kyo by the collar.

"Hey, hey! Who said I was sharing a room with you?!" Kyo exclaimed.

"I DID! NOW YOU'RE SPENDING THE NIGHT WITH US AND THAT'S FINAL!" Kagura yelled as she pinned Kyo to the wall.

"Well, I know for certain that I am not sharing a room with that stupid cat." Yuki said crossing his arms.

"Good. That means you're staying with Rin, Kisa, Hiro and me. And you can sleep in Hiro's and my bed" Haru said putting his arm around Yuki's shoulder.

"You're kidding me, right? I am not sharing a bed with TWO other people." Hiro protested.

"Well if you don't like it, the floor is actually very comfy." Haru said. Hiro groaned.

* * *

As everyone went to their rooms, Momiji started jumping on his bed as soon as he got to the hotel room.

"Hey! Cut that out! I have to use that bed, too, ya know!" Kyo said.

"Tohru! Isn't this awesome?! We can stay up as late as we want and eat snacks and stuff! It'll be just like a sleepover!" Momiji said as he hopped off the bed.

"Actually, Momiji, I'm a little tired right now, but we can do all that stuff tomorrow! I promise!" Tohru said as she started getting ready for bed.

"Alright. Hey! Maybe tomorrow, we'll go out to the mall! I've always wanted to see the clothes in American stores!" Momiji said as he crawled into bed next to Kyo, who was already sleeping.

"Yeah, that'd be so nice…" Tohru said as she dozed off to sleep next to Kagura.

* * *

Off in Yuki's/Haru's/Rin's/Kisa's/Hiro's room, Yuki got out of the shower to find Kisa, Rin and Hiro already asleep, but Haru still wide awake.

"Hey Yuki, do you want the middle or the end of the bed?" Haru asked.

"I'll take the end, thank you." Yuki answered as he put his PJs on. As Yuki crawled into bed, he felt a hand crawl up his arm.

"Haru!"

"Sssshh…you don't want to wake the others up."

"Just stop that."

"Stop what?"

"Brazing your hand over me."

"I can't help it. I want you."

"Stop it!"

"Alright, tomorrow then."

"Just go to sleep."


	3. Chapter 3 Shopping!

The next morning, Tohru woke up to see Kagura and Momiji sitting in front of the television that was in their hotel room. Kyo was still sleeping, and Tohru could swear he was purring in his sleep.

"Good morning, Tohru!" Kagura greeted.

"Good morning guys, what are you watching?" Tohru asked wiping her sleepy eyes.

"Spongebob Squarepants! It's really funny! It's about a bunch of undersea creatures!" Momiji said.

"_And then…it happened."_

_"He forgot the secret sauce?"_

_"No."_

_"He didn't wash his hands?"_

_"No!"_

_"Irregular portions?"_

_"NO! He cut off his own HAND by mistake!"_

_"You mean like this? (PLUCK) Or like this? Like this? Or like this? What about _this_?_"

"_Except he wasn't a sponge."_

_"So?"_

_"SO IT DIDN'T GROW BACK!"_

_"OOOHHH NOOOO!!"_

Momiji burst out laughing as Tohru giggled a little at the sponge and squid.

"C'mon Kyo! Get up! We have to meet everyone downstairs for breakfast!" Kagura said pulling Kyo out of bed.

"Mmmph. Give me five more minutes…" Kyo said clutching onto his pillow.

"GET UP! WE HAVE TO GO TO EAT!!" Kagura yelled as she flipped the mattress over, making it land on top of Kyo.

"Alright! Fine! I'm up! For Pete's sake!" Kyo shouted as he crawled from under the mattress.

As soon as they were all dressed, they headed down to the lobby for breakfast. Most of the family was already downstairs eating their breakfast.

"Well, it's about time! What took you so long? Did the cat sleep in again?" Hiro said.

"Hey! You'd sleep in too if you had Blondie here snoring all night!" Kyo said pointing to Momiji.

"Good morning, Ms. Honda. I hope you slept well last night." Yuki greeted Tohru.

"Why, yes I did, thank you." Tohru responded blushed.

"Kyo didn't try to sneak into your bed last night, did he? My poor flower…" Shigure smugged as he drank his coffee.

"Hell NO!! Why would I want to DO THAT?! KAGURA was there with her!!" Kyo shouted.

"It would be nice if you didn't shout, Kyo. We're in a public place." Hatori said nibbling on his bagel.

"Shigure, Hatori, where's Ayame and Ritsu?" Tohru asked.

"Ayame is fixing Ritsu's hair…and applying his makeup." Hatori answered.

"Shigure, what are we going to do today?" Kisa asked as she munched on her cereal.

"Well, Aaya and I decided we would go to the mall." Shigure answered.

"YAY! That's awesome! To the mall!" Momiji cheered.

"Ah, so I see the group has agreed with my brilliant suggestion!" Ayame said as he walked downstairs with Ritsu right behind him. As Ritsu peeked out from behind his older cousin, everyone noticed how thick Ritsu's make-up was.. Aaya had applied green eye shadow with blue eyeliner along with a cherry colored lipstick.

"Well, how do I look?" Ritsu said sort of turning away from the crowd.

"You look cheap." Hiro blurted out.

"AH! FORGIVE ME! PLEASE! WHAT HAVE I DONE?! I'VE LET PRECIOUS AYAME WASTE SOME OF HIS GOOD MAKE-UP ON MY WORTHLESS FACE! I DON'T DESERVE IT! I'M SO SORRY!" Ritsu shouted running around the lobby.

"It's all right, Ritsu. I think you look absolutely beautiful." Haru said as he put down his cereal and put his arm on Ritsu's hip. Rin just groaned and picked at her toast.

After breakfast, everyone headed down to the big mall not far from their hotel. They couldn't help but notice how huge it was.

"Wow! It's bigger than I imagined! Tohru, let's go look at all the cute clothes!" Momiji said pulling on Tohru's sleeve. All of the younger kids, and Ritsu followed them, while the Mabudachi Trio walked around different areas. Hatori picked the first store they would go to, and he unsurprisingly picked the book store. As soon as they walked in, Ayame rushed to the magazine rack and Shigure walked over to the Romance section which was conveniently right next to the magazines.

"Shigure, you amaze me everyday! I still can't believe you and Hatori can read English! As you remember, I would always struggle in that class. I don't even know why I'm here. My place is among all the wonderful outfits in the rest of this mall!" Ayame said as he saw Shigure fingering through a romance novel.

"Tell you what, Aaya; you get to pick the next store! In the meantime, I know a language here that is universal, and you would love." Shigure said looking through the magazines.

"Oh?"

"Yes. Here we go! The magic of body language!" Shigure said as he picked up a Playboy magazine.

"Oh, Shigure! You know me so well! You always know what I like…" Aaya said as he accepted the magazine from Shigure and put his arms around his waist.

"Aaya…" Shigure whispered as he brazed Ayame's cheek.

Meanwhile, Hatori watched with disinterest as he questioned the clerk at the front desk.

"I need a book. A long one that distracts me from the real world." Hatori requested.

"Well, personally, I suggest Stephen King's _It,_ it's very interesting but it's also very scary." The clerk said as he stared at the supposedly Asian girl with silver hair embracing the Asian man with black hair.

"I don't think anything in books can scare me more than _my_ life." Hatori said as he tried to ignore Ayame and Shigure.

Meanwhile, Tohru, Kagura, Yuki, Kyo, and Momiji were browsing in the middle of a _Forever 21_.

"Oh, these clothes are so adorable! I can't decide which one to pick!" Tohru said as she looked at one cute outfit after another.

"Honestly, Ms. Honda, I'd think you'd look absolutely gorgeous in this." Yuki said as he held up a lime green, sleeveless mini-dress with a yellow flower pendant on the shoulder.

"Don't tell her what to wear, you damn rat." Kyo said.

"I'm merely making suggestions. Plus, it's probably a lot more wholesome than what _you_ want her to wear. You probably have some skimpy midriff and miniskirt in mind." Yuki said.

"I DO NOT!!" Kyo yelled.

"Look what I found!" Momiji said as he showed them a yellow v-neck shirt with bright red stripes on it.

"Um, I think that shirt is cut for a woman, Momiji." Yuki said as he noticed the waist and hips didn't exactly fit Momiji's body.

"Oh well, it's still cute!" Tohru said.

"Kyo, what do you think of this?" Kagura asked as she showed up in a bright orange shirt and skirt outfit along with orange earrings and an orange headband.

"I think I've gone blind." Kyo said referring to all the color putting a strain on his eyes.

"MEANIE!!YOU'RE SO MEAN, KYO!!" Kagura yelled as she gave Kyo a major noogie with a bunch of people staring.

"Eh! Please, guys, let's not make a scene!" Tohru said as she tried to pull the two apart.

Not far from _Forever 21_, Kisa and Hiro were browsing through a GAP store.

"Hiro, what do you think of this outfit?" Kisa asked as she walked out of the dressing room in a pink t-shirt with little purple butterflies along with a plaid skirt.

"Um, it's OK; I can honestly say it doesn't make you look like a dork." Hiro said when what he really meant was that it was too cute for words. For him, he found some baggy khaki pants with a black shirt that read in green letters "I'll Be Nicer When You Be Smarter."

"Hey, where did Haru and Rin go? They were here a second ago." Hiro commented.

Rin was actually just wandering through the mall. She noted how there were absolutely no sailor school uniforms in sight, except for that little cosplay shop she saw a few stores ago. It honestly made her a little relieved; she hated those things because they were so corny. As she walked through the mall, she stumbled upon an interesting store, _Hot Topic._ There was something about the atmosphere that drew her in. Before she knew it, she was looking at all the unique articles of clothing; stuff that actually looked like it would fit her style.

As she was browsing, she found the little lingerie section in the back of the store. One thing that caught her eye was a black and purple checkered bra covered in little purple skulls on it.

"Wow, how incredibly tacky." She said out loud while honestly she was thinking _This is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen._ Little did she know, Haru had snuck out of GAP and had been following her. He also found _Hot Topic _to be interesting. He'd already found the perfect outfit for himself, checkered pants with a black shirt that read in red letters "Chainsaw Beats Rock, Paper, and Scissors!" He also found some cool boots, belt with realistic looking bullets, and a chain necklace to go with it. He felt at home here. As soon as Rin noticed he was there, she gasped.

"You scared me!" Rin said lightly shoving Haru.

"I realized you found your home planet." Haru said while gazing at all the merchandise.

"Ok, I admit it, this place does actually have a lot of stuff I like." Rin said as she looked at the interesting spaghetti string tops. She ended up buying a black tank top with a big red lightening bolt design along with a leather mini-skirt and a choker with a little amulet. Haru was anxious to see her wear it along with what he got for her.

After several hours, it was time to head back to the hotel. As everyone got into the cars, Hiro bulged his eyes at Ayame's outfit.

"What the heck are you wearing?!" Hiro asked. Ayame giggled in his droopy-sleeved, silky woman's shirt with little blue and green bubbles on it and his light blue skirt with a matching belt. He flipped his hair to reveal the big silver hoops in his ears.

"Do you like it? I picked this up in one of the little boutiques!" Ayame said.

"I think it's really pretty." Kisa said. Hiro was at a loss for words.

"Yes, Ayame, I must agree, you look ravishing!" Shigure said as she put his hands in the pockets of his new blue jeans as he stood in a red t-shirt that read "Chick Magnet."

In the other car, Yuki had gotten a green and white striped polo while Kyo picked up a basketball jersey for the Lakers. Honestly, he knew squat about the team, but he did like the way the shirt looked on him. Kagura thought she had bought a matching outfit, but what she ended up getting was the cheerleading uniform. Shigure insisted she wear it, but Hatori insisted not to wear it very often.

"Ritsu! My, you look stunning!" Tohru said as she saw Ritsu in his pink polo dress.

"You really think so?" He blushed.

"Absolutely!" She beamed.

"Hatori! You didn't buy anything!" Momiji said as he saw Hatori in his normal clothes.

"That's not true. I got a very thick book that shall distract me from nights with Shigure and Ayame…and Ayame bought me a sweater." Hatori said as he started the car.

Back in Ayame's car, Rin stared out the window so she wouldn't get motion sickness. Hiro and Kisa had gotten tired out during the mall trip so they fell asleep in the backseat.

"Hey Rin, I got a surprise for you." Haru said as he pulled up his shopping bag. He pulled out the purple skull bra she had been staring at earlier.

"I saw you peeking at this and saw you were interested in it." He said. She blushed as she put it in her bag and gave him a hug.


	4. Chapter 4 A Few Upsets

Everyone had their bags packed for their train ride to their next destination

Everyone had their bags packed for their train ride to their next destination."Where exactly are we going, Hatori?" Kisa asked.

"Well, Ayame and Shigure insist…that we go to Las Vegas." Hatori answered with a sigh.

"Vegas?! Oh, I hear that place is absolutely beautiful! So many lights! So many shows!" Tohru gleefully cheered.

"So many hookers…" Kyo murmured. Yuki responded by slapping the cat across the cheek with the back of his hand.

"Must you always have such a dirty mouth?"

"I'm just saying it because it's true!"

"Yes, well, I was hoping you'd notice there are young people here and you would hold that filthy tongue of yours." Yuki said crossing his arms.

"What's a hook-" Kisa's question was interrupted by Hiro's hand covering her mouth.

"It's a woman with no dignity who you should never have to come across in your entire life." Hiro explained in his own way.

"Oh, I am afraid it's too late for that, children. We have one in our very presence at this moment now!" Ayame said as he made pointing gestures to Rin.

"Hey! You want me to rearrange your face, you she-male?!" Rin exclaimed

"Just make sure Haru doesn't wear purple or else people are gonna be asking him how much you cost!" Shigure joined in on the teasing.

"SHUT UP!" Rin screamed as she chucked a tube of lipstick from her purse at Shigure. Haru just grabbed her waist and pulled her close to him and put his head on her shoulder to calm her down.

After the train ride was over, they headed over to their next hotel for the evening. They found it more convenient to just keep the same sleeping arrangements. As Hatori's half got into their rental car, Ritsu decided to turn on the radio. It was in the middle of a news bulletin about a 23-year old teacher who was caught having an affair with a 16-year-old student.

"How dishonorable. I can't think of anything more that disgust me." Hatori scoffed at the new report. Tohru just looked down at her lap and put her arms around her legs. Kyo noticed she looked a little upset, but he didn't see why. Then it hit him, her parents had been one of those cases of a student and teacher falling in love.

"Um, Hatori…" Kyo tried to stop the doctor.

"In a second, Kyo. I mean why would people stoop down to such a low level? Can't they just find people their own age?" Hatori finished his little rant, "Now what did you want, Kyo?"

"I'll tell you later."

Meanwhile, in Ayame's car, Shigure pointed out a little restaurant.

"Oh, look! That looks like a good place to eat." Shigure said pointing to a Chick-Fil-A. Haru looked out the window to see the big poster advertising the restaurant and made an uncomfortable face. Having cows misspell almost every other word did not sit well with him. Why must people always make cows seem so stupid? He hated it, and it was the kind of thing that set him off.

As they arrived at the hotel, Kyo marched straight over to Hatori.

"Hatori, Tohru's parents met when her dad was a student teacher at her mom's school. They got married after she left middle school when she was 15." Kyo explained as he whispered. Hatori's eyes lost all color and his cheeks turned bright red. How dare he just embarrass her like that?

"I'm so sorry…I…I didn't know." Hatori said as he walked away feeling like complete dirt.

Later that evening, Hatori sat in the chair in his hotel room trying to read the book he'd bought in LA, but he just couldn't get what he'd done off his mind.

"Hatori, where are you going?" Shigure asked when he saw his friend leaving for the door.

"I have to pick up something." Hatori answered.

"I'll go with you; I need to get something, too." Shigure said as he followed Hatori out to the car.

They drove to the nearest Hallmark, which they heard was the best place to get what they needed. Shigure found almost instantly what he needed, and took the time to spy on Hatori grabbing an apology card.

"What's this about, hm? What did you do that's so bad that your conscious couldn't take it anymore and forced you to run out here in the middle of the night and buy a card for it?" Shigure circled around Hatori.

"I…I insulted Tohru." Hatori murmured.

"WHAT?! How DARE you insult my precious flower! Seriously though, what did you do?" Shigure said.

"Well, to put it shortly, I said I hated student-teacher affairs, and her parents were one. What about you? What are _you_ here for?" Hatori said as he picked out the card with a little puppy with huge eyes on the cover saying, "I'm Sowy."

"Well, I needed to pick up a postcard to update Akito on our trip." Shigure said.

"Oh, yeah , I still can't believe Akito allowed us to travel all the way to America."

"…"

"Shigure, _please_ tell me Akito knows about this trip."

"Hatori, I swear to you, I informed Akito about our cross-country trip."

* * *

Meanwhile, back in Japan, Akito lay on the floor in her room listening to the birds chirping as she always did. Seriously, didn't she have any hobbies? Kureno sat in the corner like he normally did.

"I still can't believe you let them go on that trip." Kureno said. Akito turned and looked at him.

"I just decided to take a break from them. Give them some time to miss me. They're so going to be wishing they'd never left once they get back." Akito explained while a bird perched on her finger.

"But across the country?" Kureno asked.

"Look, Kureno, Japan, although a very crowded country is also a small country. It doesn't take long to travel across and back. They're probably already on their way back." Akito assured him.

* * *

Meanwhile, back in Las Vegas at the hotel, Haru lay in bed unable to go to sleep. He was still thinking vividly about that Chick-Fil-A poster with the cow and the sign that said "EAT MOR CHIKIN." It was really making him angry. He decided to calm his nerves by flipping through the magazine that Kisa had gotten. As he looked at all the American actors and actresses, he came across another Chick-Fil-A ad, but this one had a cow in a dress and wig and a shade of deep red lipstick on. That was it. His lid popped and Black Haru emerged into the dead of night. He marched out of the hotel and towards the nearest Chick-Fil-A about a few blocks away. There were people who noticed the black-and-white haired Asian kid breaking through the Chick-Fil-A window, but they were either too drunk or too stoned to do anything. This _was_ Las Vegas at night after all.

As Haru crashed through the window he broke the legs of all the chairs and tables. He knocked over all the registers and jumped to the kitchen area. He ripped the door off the freezer and threw the frozen food items around everywhere. He crushed the deep fryer baskets and spilled cooking oil and grease all over the floor. He got a hold of all the condiments and smushed them all over the ground. Finally, he roundhouse-kicked the stove into the wall. As, he was about to sabotage the play place, he slipped on an open mustard packet and banged his head on the hard tile. He lay there out cold in a pool of mustard, mayonnaise and ketchup.


	5. Chapter 5 Viva Las Vegas!

A/N: In honor of the last day of school, I posted this chapter a day earlier than usual! Enjoy!

When Yuki had awakened, he saw everyone else was still asleep, except Haru. He wasn't in bed, so he thought he might be in the bathroom.

"Haru, are you in there?" Yuki whispered as he knocked on the door. There was no answer. He opened the door to find it empty. He figured he must've already gone down for breakfast. He had to say this hotel was more interesting than the previous one they'd stayed in. There was a lot of interesting people; so many people who had come to press their luck. Last night, he saw a group of performers in their glittery aqua leotards and colorful, feathered headdresses check in. The place reminded him of his brother, Ayame.

When he got to the lobby, he saw only Ayame, Ritsu, Kagura and Kyo there.

"Ah, good morning, Yuki! Did you miss your big brother? If you want, tonight, we'll fall asleep embracing each other!" Ayame greeted almost too cheery for the morning.

"No thanks, the bed's already crowded. Has anyone seen Haru?" Yuki said. Everyone looked up from their meal.

"You mean he's not still in the room?" Kagura asked.

"Maybe he went exploring or something and got lost in the hotel." Kyo said.

"OOHH NOOOO!! HARU'S GONE!! I MUST HAVE SAID SOMETHING TO OFFEND HIM AND HE RAN OFF!! OH HE COULD BE GONE FOREVER BECAUSE OF ME!" Ritsu shouted dropping his morning banana.

"Ma'am, please don't shout in the lobby. It's disturbing to the other guests." The bellboy of the hotel warned Ritsu.

"I'm sorry…so sorry…" Ritsu said as he fell to the ground.

After that little episode, the small group woke everyone else in the family and Tohru up, and they looked around the whole hotel, but they couldn't find their lost cow.

"I don't understand, where could he have gone?" Tohru asked almost panicky.

"Something could've happened to him!" Rin said rather concerned herself.

"Don't worry, we'll find Haru if it's the last thing we do!" Shigure exclaimed. Just as he said that, Haru walked through the door of the hotel.

"Well, that was easy." Hatori commented. Kisa ran over and hugged Haru.

"There you are! We were looking all over for you!" Kisa said squeezing him tightly.

"Where the heck did you go? You could've have gotten hurt!" Rin said punching him in the shoulder.

"I…went to the corner store early in the morning…to pick up some gum…and I got lost on the way back." Haru struggled to make up a cover story, when in reality he woke up this morning in a pool of grease and condiments in a trashed Chick-Fil-A. He managed to escape before the cops showed up.

"Why do you smell like mustard and ketchup?" Hiro asked holding his noise.

"Um…I don't know." Haru said as he walked upstairs to take a shower.

In the evening, the family headed out to check out the beautiful night life of Las Vegas. There were so many shows, so many places to go, it was hard to choose what to do first.

"Everyone turn your cell phones on! We don't want to get lost!" Shigure said to the group.

"Remember, at midnight sharp, we all meet back here at the cars." Hatori reminded.

"Oh Shigure, Hatori! We just have to go to the casino! We'll gamble our hearts away." Ayame said pointing to the largest, brightest, most extravagant casino in sight.

"Excellent idea, Aaya! Ritsu, you should come, too." Shigure said as he pulled on Ritsu hand.

"Really? But, I don't know what to do there." Ritsu muttered as he followed the Mabudachi Trio into the casino.

"It's not that complicated, really. All you have to do is bet your money and follow the instructions on the games." Shigure explained as they went to the front desk to get their chips.

Meanwhile, Tohru, Kyo, Kagura, Yuki, and Momiji stumbled upon the shop where the performers got their costumes.

"Yay! Dress-up! Let's try on all the clothes!" Momiji exclaimed.

"That sounds like fun!" Tohru said excited.

"Okay! I'm in, too!" Kagura said as she rushed to the racks to choose a costume.

"I'm going to go get a drink." Kyo said leaving the shop.

As for Kisa and Hiro, they saw an advertisement for a nearby magic show, and Kisa begged that they'd go.

"Alright, but I hear these guys are phonies." Hiro commented as they bought their tickets. As they sat in their seats, Hiro squinted trying to look at the stage.

"I can't see anything from here! I'm moving up closer." Hiro said getting out of his seat and walking towards the stage.

"But Hiro! We should stay in our seats! We don't want to get in trouble!" Kisa panicked.

"Hey, if I'm going to pay ten bucks for a ticket, I should get my money's worth." Hiro said as he walked closer to the stage. Kisa followed him because she didn't want to sit by herself. As they walked closer to the stage, they noticed the door for the backstage.

"Hey, how about we check it out in there?" Hiro said mischievously.

"I don't know, Hiro. It looks like it's off limits." Kisa said.

"C'mon, it'll be fun! And if anyone catches us, we'll say we got lost." Hiro pressured her as he led her through the backstage entrance. They saw some of the most bizarre things ever! Animals in costumes, people breathing fire, acrobats, you name it!

"Whoa, this place is so cool. Stay close by me, Kisa you don't want to-" Hiro started, but then was interrupted by a sudden "POOF" noise. He looked to his side to find Kisa in tiger form as well as the big man in a spotted leotard and dramatic make-up that had accidentally bumped into her.

"Oh, sorry kids." He said in a deep voice. No one had appeared to notice that she had transformed and thought that the tiger was just part of another act, and the poof noise was simply an effect.

"There you are! We've been looking for you!" said a female voice from behind Hiro. He turned around to see a woman in a business suit. She put a leash on Kisa and carried her away to Hiro's shock.

"You know better than to run away right before a big show." The woman said to Kisa. She obviously had mistaken her for a show tiger.

"But…I…She's…" Hiro tried to speak, but the woman had already disappeared into the crowd.

Meanwhile, Haru and Rin wandered around town not sure what activity to do. Then, they walked by a dance club with music booming through its walls.

"Hey Rin, I say we go in there." Haru said as he stopped walking.

"I don't know. I'm not really a big fan of dancing in a crowd." Rin said crossing her arms.

"C'mon it'll be fun." He said as he pulled her in.

"We're gonna make fools of ourselves!" Rin said trying to resist.

"It doesn't matter here, and besides, you got sweet moves." Haru insisted. Rin just blushed and followed him in. There were many multi-colored lights flashing around, and the music was so loud, they couldn't even here themselves think. Rin looked around the place saw the craziest kids she'd ever seen in her life. There were couples making out and guys chugging down beer. Akito would hate this place, but Akito wasn't here. The thought was so new to Rin, it almost scared her. She could do whatever she wanted, and Akito wouldn't find out because he was thousands of miles away.

"Glow stick?" Haru said as he offered her a bright orange glow stick to go with the 5 glow necklaces around his neck. She nodded and he put the lanyard around her neck. As the DJ played a new song, Rin pulled Haru's arm towards the dance floor.

"C'mon cowboy, let's dance!"

Back at the casino, Ayame, Shigure, and Ritsu were gambling on the slots and blackjack, while Hatori just sat at the bar.

"One Amazake, please." Hatori ordered from the bartender.

"Excuse me?"

"I'm sorry, I meant Bud Light." Hatori said remembering America did not carry Amazakes.

"Hey Hari! C'mon, why don't you play the slots just once?" Shigure said joining Hatori at the bar.

"I'd like to keep my money, thank you very much." Hatori said taking a sip of his Bud Light.

"Well, Hatori could you at least lend me 5 bucks?"

"Why?"

"…"

"You lost all your money, didn't you?"

"Oh Hari, you're so smart! So is that a yes or a no?"

"No." Hatori answered directly. Shigure whimpered away. Then as Hatori got back to his drink, a provocatively dressed woman with an enormous amount of make-up on pulled up the seat next to him.

"Hey hot stuff, you looking for some fun?" She spoke seductively and played with the buttons on his shirt. Hatori just glared at her uninterested.

"Ma'am, you really must consider getting a real job." Hatori said as he turned the other way and took another sip of his beer.

Back at the slots, Ritsu was confused about what to do.

"Ayame, can you help me? How do you work this machine?" Ritsu asked.

"Oh, well it's awfully simple, all you have to do is put the quarter in the slot like this, and then just pull on the crank, and Voila! The coins come flying out!" Ayame explained as he tested one and received about 5 dollars back. So, Ritsu decided to try it out for himself. He carefully dropped the coin into the slot and closed his eyes as he pulled the crank. The wheels in the machine spun until it stopped one by one, 7777. Suddenly, the machine poured out coins nonstop.

"Oh no! I broke it! I'm so sorry!" Ritsu screamed.

"No Ritsu! You won the jackpot!" Ayame cheered as he gathered Ritsu's winnings in a large bucket.

"Wow, Ritsu. I guess beginner's luck really comes in handy." Shigure said as he helped Ayame pick up the coins as well as took a few for himself.

"I…I won?" Ritsu said shocked. He wobbled around a bit and then passed out on the ground.

At the costume shop, Momiji, Tohru and Kagura had finished dressing as Kyo and Yuki sat down each drinking a Coke.

"Ready? Tadaa!" Momiji announced as they pulled the dressing curtains. Both Kyo and Yuki were so shocked they fell out of their seats.

"Well? What do you think?" Kagura said in her glittery blue showgirl outfit, white evening gloves and bright green eye shadow as well as matching green ballet flats.

"I didn't overdue it, did I?" Tohru said striking an innocent pose in her metallic pink strapless mini-dress and white fish-net stockings and black mary-janes. She also wore a large silver tiara with crystals dangling at the side and some shiny cherry red lipstick.

"Ms. Honda…" Yuki managed to say before passing out. Kyo remained conscious but still couldn't find the strength to get back up. He couldn't take his eyes off Tohru, and he felt like he needed a tissue for his nose.

"I think you look beautiful, Tohru!" Momiji praised in, shocker, a pink bunny suit. But not the kind of suit you buy for kids to wear on Halloween or Easter. We're talking about the one-piece bunny suits that all the blonde bimbos wear to a party at the Playboy mansion. Of course, Momiji being so naïve, he didn't understand and saw it as another cute outfit to wear. It didn't help that he'd used too much mascara and wore a deep shade of purple blush. _This_ was when Kyo passed out.

By the time the cat and rat came to, the others had already changed out, but not before taking pictures to remember forever. As they walked out of the costume shop, they found a poster for the magic show.

"Oh, that sounds like so much fun! We should go!" Kagura said as she managed to drag everyone into the show with her. After buying tickets, they took their seats and had arrived just in time for the next act.

"And now, it is time for the Disappearing Tiger! I shall have my lovely assistant here bring out a big, vicious tiger!" The magician announced as a woman in a little red dress brought an orange tiger cub. The crowded awed at the adorable little cub, but something gave the zodiac members a little tingly feeling. Behind the curtain, Hiro hid sweating like a maniac.

"I shall place this tiger in this box, and count to three! When three, being the third number be reached, this tiger shall disappear!" The magician announced to the crowd as he placed the cub in the shiny purple box.

"One…two…(POOF!)" Before the magician reached three, a loud poof came from the box. When the magician pulled the box apart, he revealed…Kisa! She had changed back in the box and was using the yellow sheet that had been placed in the box to cover herself. The crowd gasped, and then burst into applause, except for the Sohmas and Tohru in the back. They stood there completely numb, and they had lost all color from their eyes. Finally, Yuki yelled,

"Kisa! What is she _doing_ up there?"

"Since when is Kisa in the show?" Momiji asked.

The magician on stage was also completely shocked as well, but before he could say anything, the little orange-haired girl had run off stage. Kisa ran towards Hiro behind the curtain.

"Hiro! I was so scared! Let's get out!" Kisa said clutching to her cousin.

"Ditto, I got your clothes, let's am-scray!" Hiro said as they rushed to the nearest bathroom for Kisa to change. When they got out, they met up with the others who were watching. Everyone just stood there completely silent.

"Let's just go back to the car, and never say a word about this ever again." Kyo said.

"Agreed." The others said in unison.

At the dance club, Rin and Haru were getting their grooves on the dance floor. They'd found an open area with little people so they didn't bump into anybody. They danced to the classic "Disco Inferno" and people around them cheered. It was a relief to them to be doing a dance other than the traditional New Year's dance. It was a form of release. And when a Latin song played, they met eyes, and did the tango. They had seen this on TV, and had decided to practice it about a couple months back. They were actually pretty good. After the tango, Haru was challenged to a break dance off by another guy. He got on the floor, spun on his head, and did all the flashy moves you see on TV. Rin watched, and as Haru danced, she checked her watch, then her jaw dropped.

"Holy crap! Haru, it's 12:23! We're late!" She shouted. Haru fell flat on the floor, completely exhausted, and Rin dragged him to the car on her back.

"Well it's about time. We were just about call you. You know you're late." Hatori said.

"We know, we lost track of time." Rin said almost giggling over the fun she had. She put the limp Haru in the seat next to her and got in the car as well as everyone else.

"That was so much fun! We should come here more often!" Ayame said as he drove the car.

"Well, how did you guys spend your time?" Shigure asked the kids in the seats behind him. Kisa and Hiro looked as each other as sweat drops fell off their foreheads.

"Um, we went to a show." Hiro summed it up.

"What kind of show?" Haru asked.

"A magic show." Kisa answered.

"Well? Was it fun?" Rin asked.

"Yeah." Kisa and Hiro said in unison.

When everybody got back to the hotel, they got some well deserved sleep. Shigure, however, was bothered by the light in the corner. He rubbed his eyes to see Hatori was reading the book he'd gotten back in LA.

"You're still reading that this late?" Shigure asked sleepily.

"I'll put it away in a few moments. By the way, did you already mail that postcard to Akito?" Hatori said looking up from his book.

"Yeah. I got the super express service, so it should be there by now." Shigure said as he tried to fall asleep. Hatori just sat in the comfy hotel chair reading _IT_. The main story sounded ridiculous to him. An evil monster that lived in the drains? And he preys on this group of kids in the form of a clown? The thought was frivolous. Although, he had to admit, the author's style was well-written and made it believable. He put down the book and got up to take his shower. However he hesitated when he looked at the drain. At first he just stared at it, and then he turned around and went to bed.

"Maybe I'll shower tomorrow." He said to himself.

* * *

Meanwhile, back in Japan, Akito and Kureno were in the same spots they were in the last time we checked up on them. They had a routine, and they liked to keep up with it.

"Kureno, go check the mail." Akito ordered. Kureno didn't say a word, he just headed out to the mailbox outside and returned with it.

"Anything interesting?" Akito asked.

"Just a postcard." Kureno answered.

"Well, what does it say?" Akito asked. Kureno decided to read it before telling Akito. As he read, every word make his skin turn pale and his cheeks run red.

_Dear Akki,_

_Konnichiwa, What's up, and Hola! We are having a wonderful time here in America! Oops! I must've have forgotten to tell you, we're traveling across the United States. Yes, when I told you we were going cross country, I didn't specify _which _country we were going across exactly. Anyway I hope you and Kureno are doing well. It's a shame you couldn't come. You're missing out on a lot! Oh well, hope to talk to you later! Toodles!_

_Love,_

_Shigure_

_P.S-Say hi to Ren for me!_

"Kureno, are you just going to stand there or are you going to tell me what it says?" Akito asked impatiently.

"Oh, it's not important."

"Let me see it."

"It's nothing, really."

"Kureno! Give it to me!"

"I'd rather not."

"HAND IT OVER, DAMN YOU!" Akito shouted as she snatched the postcard from Kureno's hand. Kureno stepped back as Akito read the postcard. When she was done, he expected an explosion. Instead, she just looked up calmly.

"Kureno, would you please go take out the trash?" She said without a feeling of threat. He just shrugged and carried the nearby trash can outside. He took it to the giant dumpster in the front of the yard. Once he'd poured out all the trash, he thought he smelled something. Were the maids cooking dinner already? He turned around to see the main house engulfed in flames! He gasped and ran around to find some help. He ran to the back of the house, and found Akito, panting heavily, ashes on her kimono, eyes a deep shade of red, and positioned as if she were about to pounce on somebody.

"THEY WENT TO AMERICA?!" Akito shouted as the house behind her was burning down. She growled and then pulled on Kureno's shirt as she marched away from the house.

"Akito, the house!" Kureno exclaimed.

"Oh, let the maids take care of it!" She shot back as she headed in a certain direction.

"Where are we going?!" Kureno asked as he followed Akito's lead. She jolted her head to face him and grinned cunningly.

"We are going to America."


	6. Chapter 6 Postcards and Hot Dogs

The morning after their night in Vegas, no one got up before noon. They had exhausted themselves out the night before and now they had woken up after the hotel breakfast was already closed. Actually, no restaurants served breakfast after 11. It would be strange, but they would have to eat lunch food after they woke up. Since no one had any idea what they wanted, they decided to stop at the first restaurant they saw. The first restaurant they came up to…was a Sonic. They found it convenient that they didn't have to leave the car. Everyone decided to order either chicken or a salad, except for Ritsu.

"I'll have…a Coney. That sounds interesting." He mumbled softly as he looked at the menu. When the food had arrived, Ritsu had been enjoying his delicious "Coney" until he realized what it really was.

"Hm, this is so delicious, but it kind of reminds me of…a hot dog." Ritsu said in between swallows.

"That's because it IS a hot dog, stupid monkey!" Kyo said. Ritsu dropped his meal and froze for a moment. Everyone knew an explosion was building up. After a few seconds, it appeared.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!! WHAT HAVE I DONE?? I'VE STUPIDLY DEVOURED ONE OF SHIGURE'S OWN KIND!! I'M SUCH A TERRIBLE PERSON!!I DON'T DESERVE TO BE ON THE SURFACE OF THIS EARTH!! AAHHHH! THERE IS NO WAY I CAN BE FORGIVEN AFTER THIS!!" Ritsu screamed while banging his head on the roof of the car.

"Ritsu! Calm down! A hot dog is NOT made out of dog!" Yuki spoke in a loud tone so Ritsu could hear him. Suddenly, the monkey stopped.

"It's…it's not?" Ritsu whispered.

"No, silly! It's made from chicken, pork, and beef!" Momiji beamed forgetting he was only setting off the alarm again.

"OOHH NOOOOO!! INSTEAD OF EATING ONE COUSIN, I'VE GUZZLED DOWN _THREE_ COUSINS!! I SHOULDN'T BE ALIVE RIGHT NOW!!I'M SORRY KAGURA!! I'M SORRY HATSUHARU!! I CAN'T APOLOGIZE TO KURENO UNTIL NEW YEARS, BUT UNTIL THEN HE'LL NEVER KNOW THE EVIL CRIME I HAVE COMMITTED!! I'M THE WORLD'S WORST PERSON AND I DESERVE TO BE BURIED UNDERNEATH THE GROUND!!" Ritsu yelled as he jumped out of the car and started rolling around on the street. Then, a waiter ran out into the parking lot.

"Ma'am! Please calm down! You are causing an unnecessary ruckus! Otherwise, we'll have to ask you to leave!" The man warned Ritsu. Shigure popped out of his car and gave Ritsu a nice poke in the hip, sending him into his sleeping state.

"Sorry sir, we'll take him home as soon as possible." Shigure said carrying unconscious Ritsu back to his seat.

After breakfast/lunch, the family stumbled upon a local media store. They decided to check it out, because they came to this country to see some culture (and get away from Akito), and they could definitely find it in music, movies, and books.

"Oh, I've always wanted to try some American recipes." Tohru said as she browsed through the cooking section.

"I'm sure whatever you make will be delicious." Yuki commented and made Tohru blush.

"Ugh, gag me, you're such a sap." Hiro said pointing to his tongue. Hatori just grabbed a seat and continued reading the novel he'd bought in LA. The first thing Ayame and Shigure did was go to the music section. They took out a whole bunch of CDs and listened to the samples. The one that really stood out was the Madonna album. Ayame especially loved it. He bought it and was super anxious to get back to Mine and have her listen to it. Kisa was also in the music section. Ever since she'd heard "Big Girls Don't Cry" on the radio, she couldn't get it out of her head, so she looked for the Fergie CD. Kyo was just browsing through, when he stumbled upon a Linkin Park CD. For some reason, he just felt like listening to it. After a few minutes on the CD sampler, he felt a connection to this music. It was almost like it told the story of his life. Meanwhile, Haru and Rin were sampling a bunch of different Alternative bands. Rin was especially spending a lot of time with the Evanescence CD, more specifically on the song "Bring Me to Life."

"It's almost scary when you find a song that completely describes you." Haru said as listened to Michael Jackson's "Black or White."

"Tell me about it. Listen to this." Rin commented as she handed Haru the earphones to her song.

"Hm. Interesting. Hey, I dare you to sing this at the next New Year's banquet."

"No way! Forget it!" Rin shouted.

"Hey, Tohru! Look what I found! I hear all the kids are listening to it these days!" Momiji said as he hopped to where Tohru was with a Hannah Montana CD.

"Oh, that's so cool, Momiji! Maybe we can listen to it on the way back to the hotel." Tohru said with her usual smile.

Back in the book section, Yuki took the time to look at the art books. The one book that particularly caught his eye was "PostSecret." Apparently, people from all over the world send postcards to this guy in Maryland. They got really personal; some people admitted they'd killed somebody. The postcards themselves were really creatively decorated. It amazed him that people would reveal such personal information to a complete stranger. It disgusted him, yet he could not resist reading it postcard after postcard. It turns out there was a website for this. He'd make sure to check it out later.

Kagura was looking at a bunch of magazines at the magazine rack. She found this one interesting article called "How to Snatch Your Man." It included everything from what gestures to make to what scent to wear. She read every little detail of this article believing it was her key to win Kyo's heart.

As night was coming, they went back to the hotel. In Hatori's car, Momiji played his Hannah Montana CD the whole way. Tohru, Ritsu, and Kagura liked it, but Kyo and Yuki were smashing their ears with their fists while Hatori put in some ear plugs.

"Ugh, I think my eardrums exploded." Kyo said as he twisted his finger in his ear. Yuki just headed straight for the computer at the business center in the hotel. He went to the PostSecret website to look at the weekly secrets posted up. He gasped when he saw a postcard that appeared to be covered in chalk dust with a picture of a couple kissing passionately out in the snow that read:

_I have a fantasy of hooking up with my crush in a blanket of snow and broken chalk._

The postcard was written in kanji and translated, so that probably means the sender was from Japan. Broken chalk…and snow…could this be…_Machi?_ _No. It couldn't be. What are the odds of that?_ He thought. He was sweating now. Could this card be about him?_ It could be. Why not?_ Yuki decided not to think about it anymore, and go to bed.

Meanwhile in Kyo's/Tohru's/ Momiji's/Kagura's room, Kyo was looking at a sports magazine, when Kagura walked out in a plaid miniskirt and pink tube top.

"Hey, Kyo!" Kagura giggled as did a little wave.

"Oh, hey Kagura." Kyo said not looking up from his magazine. Kagura tried doing a funny walk and plopped herself on Kyo's lap.

"Kagura, what're you doing?" Kyo asked with a confused face.

"Oh, Kyo, you're so _cute_ when you ask questions!" Kagura commented playfully as she lightly hit his shoulder.

"Hey! Don't call me cute!" Kyo shouted as he tried to scooch out from under Kagura.

"So, how's your martial arts training going?" Kagura asked as she flipped her hair back and made sure her big hoop earrings twinkled.

"You know damn well how well it's going! You know I still can't beat Yuki! And what is that smell?!" Kyo yelled as slipped out from under Kagura and out of the chair.

"It's my new perfume. It's called _Irresistible._ Do you think it smells good?" Kagura said as she stretched her neck.

"I think it smells like milk that's been rotting in dump for several weeks." Kyo answered as he held his noise. Suddenly, Kagura's eyes flashed red and she clenched her teeth as she grabbed Kyo by the legs and hammered him against the floor.

"YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO LOVE ME NOW, DAMMIT!! DO AS THE MAGAZINE SAYS AND LOVE ME!!" Kagura shouted as she twisted Kyo like a pretzel.

* * *

Thousands of miles away, Akito and Kureno got off of their plane in a New York City.

"Alright, now all we have to do is retrieve my zodiac and then we go back home. Now, where is their hotel, Kureno?" Akito asked calmly as she stepped off of the plane.

"…"

"Kureno, don't tell me you don't know where they are."

"I'm sorry, but I don't."

"Well, at least tell me we're in the right city!"

"Um…"

"KURENO! You're saying they're NOT in New York City?!" Akito yelled grabbing Kureno's shirt collar.

"Well, m-maybe, but I-I don't know, really…" Kureno stuttered.

"Then, WHY THE HELL DID YOU BUY TICKETS FOR NEW YORK CITY?!" Akito screamed as she shook Kureno back and forth.

"Well, it's a major tourist city…so I thought…maybe they'd come here." Kureno mumbled as he realized they were a lot of people staring at them. Akito's angry face became serene for a second.

"Okay, calm down. All we have to do is look at the postcard that Shigure sent us for a clue." Akito said calmly.

"Uh, I think the postcard burned down in the fire." Kureno said bursting Akito's hope. She gave him her vicious face again and punched him in the chest and stormed off.

"Well this is perfect! We're here in the United States looking for my zodiac, and we don't have a clue where they are because YOU didn't bring the damn postcard!" Akito said crushing a bag of peanuts from the plane. Then, she got an idea, and beamed at Kureno.

"You said this was a popular tourist attraction, right?" Akito asked sweetly.

"Yes…"

"Well, then there's a high chance that they will come here eventually! All we have to do is wait. Wait for them to come here and THEN we go home." Akito plotted.

"How will you know if they get here?" Kureno asked.

"Please, Kureno, I am their God. I can _feel_ when they're nearby." Akito said proudly as she tapped her head.

They walked to the nearest hotel, or at least Akito walked until she claimed she was too weak and made Kureno carry her. Akito called for a room, but for only a single room.

"Um, why don't we get a double room?" Kureno asked.

"Because, it's your fault we don't know where they are, so you sleep on the floor tonight." Akito ordered. Kureno just sighed as he gave in.


	7. Chapter 7 Off to Texas!

It had probably already been a week since they first came to America, and now the Sohmas boarded their train to Texas. Everyone admired the scenery and all the livestock.

"Hey, Haru! Rin! We found your people!" Ayame teased as he pointed to all the oxen and horses.

"Wow there sure are a lot of animals here." Tohru said as she stared out the window.

"Yes, a bunch of animals that will be chopped up and eaten." Shigure added.

"Why must you bring up things we don't want to talk about?" Yuki glared.

"Where exactly are we going?" Kisa asked.

"We going to Austin." Hatori answered.

"Who's Austin?" Momiji asked naively

"It's the capital city, stupid rabbit. Didn't you study in school?" Hiro smugged.

"We don't study North American countries until next year." Haru explained.

When they arrived at the train station, there were immediately greeted by a man in a ten gallon hat.

"Howdy ya'll, and welcome to Texas!" He said with a big smile.

"Howdy!" Kagura waved. As they headed out the train station, Hiro asked,

"Does everyone talk that way here?"

"No, silly! However, I brought this How-To-Talk-Texan book, just in case." Kagura responded.

"What's with those hats?" Kyo added.

"I thought they were rather cute!" Tohru said.

"I think they're ridiculous." Rin contradicted.

On the way to the hotel, Tohru spotted a nice little gift shop.

"Oh my goodness! I almost forgot! I promised Arisa and Saki that's I'd bring them souvenirs!" Tohru said as she rushed into the shop.

"Shopping _again_?" Kyo complained.

"If you don't like it, you can wait out here." Yuki told the cat as he followed Tohru inside. Kyo groaned as he went inside with everyone else.

"Hey Kyo! Check these out!" Kagura sang as she strutted out in a pair of cowboy boots.

"What about them?" Kyo just stared at them uninterested.

"Do you like them or not?!" Kagura asked as if it should be obvious.

"Eh." Kyo shrugged. Kagura gave him a big smack in the head.

"Don't "Eh" me! Tell me what you think! Are they cute or NOT?!" Kagura yelled and created yet another scene.

"Will you kill me if I say no?" Kyo asked. Kagura grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him like some kind of vibrating chair.

"THAT'S NO WAY TO TALK TO YOUR GIRLFRIEND!!" Kagura shouted as she started banging him against the floor.

"Excuse me, miss. If you and your beau are going to fight, could you please take it outside?" The store clerk requested.

"Sure thing, sir!" Kagura obeyed as she carried Kyo outside by the ankle.

"Wait! Hold on one second! I am NOT her "beau" and she is NOT my girlfriend!" Kyo managed to say before being carried out of the store.

Oh, look at this Yuki! It's a doo-rag! Do you think Uo will like it?" Tohru asked as she picked one up off the headgear stand.

"Yes, I believe she will absolutely love it." Yuki replied as he saw a bandana being wrapped around one's head would fit Ms. Uotani's style. Tohru tried to look for something for Hana. She knew Hana liked black things, but she wanted to give her something original, something Hana would really like. Then, she saw a rack of microwaveable pork ribs right in front of her. Hana really did like meat, but wouldn't Kagura get offended? She figured she would get them for Hana, and then just hid them from Kagura. What she didn't know wouldn't hurt her right?

"What are we going to do for dinner?" Ritsu asked.

"Well Ritsu, America is a country of many cultures, but one of the most prominent cultures around Texas is Hispanic culture. So tonight, we're dining in a Mexican restaurant!" Ayame cheered. Then he and Shigure held their thumbs up and exclaimed,

"¡Si!"

"But, I can't have Mexican food! It's all very spicy! My stomach can't take spicy food, remember?!" Rin protested.

"Rin, chill! It's not _all_ spicy. I'm sure there's at least one dish you can eat!" Shigure rebuddled. Rin just groaned.

Later, they went to a restaurant called _Casa Ole!_ and not everyone could understand Spanish. That made it a little harder to order off the menu.

"What are frijoles?" Momiji asked.

"I think it's a kind of pie…" Tohru guessed.

"No, numbskulls! Its beans! There would not be pie on the dinner section." Hiro rudely corrected.

"I'll just have a bean taco, and _pray_ they're no spices." Rin said as she looked through the menu.

"I know what I'm getting! Chimichangas!" Ayame announced to the entire table.

"Have you ever tried them before?" Kisa asked.

"No, but I love the sound of them! Chimichangas! Chimichangas! Oh, I could say that all day!" Ayame exclaimed.

"Please don't. I would like to keep my sanity, thank you very much." Hatori stated blankly as he stared at his menu.

"I just love these tortillas!" Kagura said as she pulled hr 3rd one from the center of the table.

"These chairs are interesting. They're very colorful." Yuki noted as he stared at the many bright colors on his chair.

"Is that all you can think about right now? Chairs? We came here to eat, not for interior designing." Hiro smirked.

After a nice Mexican meal, they went to their next hotel. After a few hours of relaxing, Ayame and Shigure headed out the door with their coats.

"Where do you two think you're going at this hour?" Hatori asked.

"We're off to a show. The Rocky Horror Show!" Shigure answered.

"It's a magical show with romance, fantasies, and dreams, just about everything I hold near and dear to me! We saw an ad for it at the gift shop!" Ayame elaborated.

"Alright, just don't wake me up when you come back." Hatori said as his friends left.

Meanwhile, in the other room, Rin lay on the bed she shared with Kisa holding a pillow to her stomach, groaning.

"Ugh…I swear that dog and snake are trying to kill me." Rin moaned as her stomach continued to upset her.

"Your stomach hurts, Rin?" Haru asked in the cowboy hat he got at the gift shop.

"Yeah, I told those stupid adults that Mexican food was a bad idea." Rin complained.

"Ah, I'm sorry." Haru comforted her. He sat down next to her and gently kissed her forehead. She returned his kiss with a few more kisses on the lips.

"Ahem, there are other people present, you know." Hiro broke up the moment.

"Excuse us; we just got a little carried away, that's all." Haru said as he still ran his fingers through Rin's hair.

By 3 a.m, Ayame and Shigure finally returned from the Rocky Horror Picture Show. They burst in through their room door singing the songs.

"It's just a jump to the left! Then a step to the ri-i-i-ight! Put your hands on your hips!" Ayame sang.

"And pull your knees in tight! But it's the pelvic thru-ust! That really drive you insa-a-a-ane!" Shigure followed. They concluded in unison,

"Let's do the Time Warp again!"

"Shut up! I told you guys not to wake me up when you got back!" Hatori barked as he lifted his head off of his pillow.

"Oh, I'm sorry! Did we wake you?! We were probably just too excited from the _amazing_ show we saw! A-ha ha ha! I am definitely bringing the DVD for Mine!" Ayame giggled as he wobbled around a little worn out from the fun.

"Really, Hari, you should come with us next time!" Shigure insisted.

"No, now go to bed, you two." Hatori ordered as he shoved his face back into his pillow.

"Well Hatori, could you at least do us a favor and take a shower! Phew! Your cologne can only work so much!" Ayame commented.

"What are you talking about?" Hatori lifted his face from his pillow again.

"Seriously Hari, I haven't seen you get in the shower once since you started reading that novel of yours!" Shigure said.

"I shower when you two are sleeping." Hatori bluffed.

"Yeah, your B.O is telling us otherwise." Shigure called his bluff.

"Just leave me to my own business." Hatori stated to end the conversation.

Meanwhile, in New York, Akito sat around in the hotel room impatiently. She sat on the bed with her legs crossed and her arms folded as she stared at the door. Suddenly, Kureno burst through with a bag.

"It's about time! I sent you out for food hours ago! What took you so damn long?!" Akito shouted as Kureno handed her the food.

"I'm sorry. I got lost. I'm not really good with new places." Kureno explained. Seriously the first time he went to a corner store wasn't too long ago. He felt alone and scared out there! His English wasn't very good and it was hard to find the place he was looking for. Honestly, he spent the first hour trying to leave the block! It was really crowded and there were a bunch of cars honking at him. He'd never been in such a crowded area before.

"That's just wonderful, Kureno. This food is cold!" Akito complained as her chopsticks dug around some hardening noodles.

"I can't figure out where to go here. It's so big and it's really crowded." Kureno explained.

"Aw, do you need me to hold your hand when you cross the street? Suck it up!" Akito mocked him as she slurped the rest of her noodles.


	8. Chapter 8 Wild Chase

A/N: Sorry this chapter is late, I got distracted.

Momiji ran around the hotel room at 7 in the morning ringing a large cow bell.

"C'mon! Get up! Everybody up! We're going to the ranch today!" Momiji cheered as he pranced around in overalls and cowboy boots.

"Ugh, can you let me sleep for five minutes, you stupid rabbit?!" Kyo shouted in a cranky morning rage.

"Sleeping in isn't good for you, Kyo!" Kagura wagged her finger at him.

"Neither is not getting enough sleep." Kyo mumbled as he buried his face into the pillow.

"C'mon! Get up! We're going to see all the animals at the ranch!" Momiji shouted as he jumped on Kyo's side of the bed.

"Alright, I'm up." Kyo groaned as he dragged himself out of bed and got ready.

"What kind of animals are we going to see?" Kisa asked once Tohru and everyone went downstairs.

"I'm sure we'll see cows, horses, chickens, and a lot of sheep, too!" Tohru pictured the farm animals in her head.

"Pfft. As if we already don't see a lot of those at home." Hiro smirk. Well, he had a point; the Zodiac banquet was almost like a farm itself.

"Shigure, why are you bringing a picnic basket?" Yuki asked.

"Because, little brother, we're going to have a marvelous feast in the soft grass in the presence of many splendid little animals!" Ayame answered for Shigure as he danced around in a little cowgirl dress. Yuki sighed. Did he have to cross-dress everywhere they went?

"Uh-huh! Tohru and I made sandwiches for everyone all by ourselves!" Kagura beamed proudly as she put her arm around Tohru.

"Why, that was so nice of you, Kagura. You too, Ms. Honda." Yuki thanked them.

"Eh?! No really, it was nothing! I just thought it would be a fun idea, and well Momiji liked it and I'm sorry all we made was some PB and J and potato salad, oh and some Jell-O, we would've made more but we couldn't understand what most of the stuff at the grocery store was and…" Tohru blabbed.

"It's alright, Ms. Honda. Just calm down." Yuki said soothingly as he patted her shoulders.

When they arrived at the ranch, the first thing they saw was the stable of horses. Each one made a noise as Rin passed by. She just stared at them and groaned. As everyone waited to be led to the spot where they could sit, Haru snuck away to go to the bathroom. When they were led out to the field, they picked a nice open spot and set up their picnic materials. They weren't too surprised when little animals started gathering around.

"Oh, eating while being surrounded by a bunch of animals makes me feel like Snow White!" Tohru commented.

"Yes! You make a lovely princess, Tohru! And Yuki is a dashing prince! You two should run off together to promise your love to each other forever!" Ayame monologued.

"Will you just shut up, you stupid snake?!" Kyo growled.

"Oh, are you jealous, Kyo? Are you the wretched scoundrel who intends to steal the bride away from the prince?" Ayame asked accusingly.

"NO! I'm not a scoundrel and Yuki's not a prince!" Kyo shouted.

"Does that mean I'm not a princess?" Tohru asked.

"No! I mean yes, er…" Kyo stumbled with his words.

"Would you just stop talking before you embarrass yourself even more, you stupid cat?" Yuki suggested cattily.

"THAT'S IT! WE'RE FINISHING THIS HERE AND NOW!!" Kyo exploded as he rose up to challenge Yuki.

"That's what you say every time, stupid cat." Yuki responded as he continued to sit calmly.

"Kyo, please sit down, you'll get the animals all worked up." Hatori warned. Kyo mumbled to himself as he plopped right back down and everyone continued with their meal. Then, out of the blue, Shigure noticed,

"Hm. That's strange. I don't see Haru anywhere."

Haru had just walked out of the lavatory to find everyone had already left to the picnic spot. He looked outside to see his family sitting far away from where he was now. He started running over to where they were. Unfortunately for him, the ranchers had just decided to let the oxen out to graze. They saw him and automatically started following him, but since he was running, they ended up chasing him. Haru thought he heard something rumble behind him. He looked behind himself to find a stampede of oxen coming right towards him.

"Oh, crap." That's all he said as he started running away from the crowd that was after him.

"Oh, crud! Don't tell me he's lost again!" Rin exclaimed as she put her palm to her face.

"No, actually I think that's him right there." Ritsu pointed out the black and white spot running away from a large black and white blob. As Haru ran around in circles, he got close enough to the family to confirm that the black and white dot was in fact Haru.

"Help." He squeaked as passed by everyone with the oxen hot on his tail.

"Ah! Don't worry, Hatsuharu! I'll save you!" Rin yelled as she chased after the mob of cows. However as she started to run after them, she heard another rumble behind her. The horses that had been standing around the picnic blanket were now chasing _her_!

"Oh, you've got to be kidding me!" Rin moaned as she caught up to Haru as they sprinted away from a herd twice as large as before.

"Rin! You're going to overwhelm yourself by running this much!" Haru said concerned as he noticed Rin right beside him.

"Well if I stop now, that won't help me much either. Will it?" Rin panted as she started to feel herself growing exhausted

"Oh no. Now they're being chased by bulls _and_ horses. What ever shall we do?" Shigure pointed out the obvious.

"I've got to save them! I'm going after them!" Tohru shouted in a determined yet panicky manner as she got up and chased after her friends.

"Wait! Ms. Honda! Come back, it's too dangerous!" Yuki freaked as he started to get up, but was pulled down by Hatori.

"Hold it, Yuki. We don't want them being chased by field mice, too." Hatori warned as he watched the race continue. Tohru was already far away from the picnic and was close to Rin and Haru. She didn't know she had it in her to run this fast. Maybe this was adrenaline from seeing her friends in peril. Soon enough, she caught up to them and they both looked at her in amazement.

"Tohru, what…are you…doing?!" Rin was practically gasping for air at this point.

"Wow, I never knew you could run this fast." Haru said, but this was no time for flattery.

"I'm here to save you…Ah! Isuzu!" Tohru shouted when Rin transformed for the stress of running so long. She disappeared into the cloud of black horses. Tohru was so focused on Rin she forgot to look where she was running. She accidentally bumped into Hatsuharu, making him transform as well. Tohru's legs carried her away from the herd and finally gave out in a puddle of mud. The whole group walked over to the spot where she fell.

"Ms. Honda! Are you alright?!" Yuki asked very concerned.

"What the hell were you thinking?!" Kyo shouted in frustration of the scare she gave him.

"Where are Haru and Rin?" Hiro asked having barely any concern over Tohru.

"They're…in there…somewhere…" Tohru said gasping for air as she pointed to the bulls and horses who had now stopped running and just stood there in a tight crowd. After a few minutes, they heard two big "poofs" coming from the center of the herd. The animals spread out revealing Haru and Rin in their birthday suits.

"Alright, fun's over. Someone just bring us our clothes." Rin groaned to the shocked crowd as Kisa came running up with their abandoned clothes.

Meanwhile back in New York, Akito lay on the hotel bed with absolutely nothing to do.

"Ugh. Kureno, I'm bored." She complained to her former bird as he sat in a comfy chair reading the newspaper.

"Is there anything you'd like?" He asked, ready to tend to her every whim.

"I want to watch a movie. Go to the nearest video store and buy a movie." Akito commanded without lifting her head from its place. Kureno began walking towards the door but took a pause.

"What kind of movie?" He asked.

"A scary one. The best horror film you can find." She specified. Kureno headed back outside to try and find the nearest video store. He seriously was not use to this kind of business. It took him a while, but he finally found a store with a bunch of movie titles inside. As he walked in, he started looking around for anything that looked scary.

"Excuse me, can I help you sir?" The clerk asked.

"Um, yes, could I find a scary movie here?" Kureno asked in order to make sure he was in the right place.

"Well, sir, you _are_ in Blockbuster. Anything about the movie you need?" The clerk sort of giggled at the young man's expression. He looked like a little lost kid!

"I need…the scariest movie ever made." Kureno requested. That was what Akito meant right? The best horror film would be the scariest, right?

"Well the scariest movie is debatable. However, I personally recommend _The Exorcist_. I slept with the lights on for weeks after I watched it." She pointed to the movie sitting on top of the rack in front of Kureno. He picked it up and stared at it.

"Um… I guess I'll take it then." He stuttered as he put the movie on the counter.

"Would you like some popcorn for your movie, sir?" The clerk asked.

"Uh, sure, I guess." Kureno mumbled. Honestly, he just wanted to get back to the hotel before Akito threw another fit about how long he took.

When he arrived back to the room, Akito seemed excited to see him.

"Ah! You're back! Did you get the movie?" Akito asked.

"Yeah, it's called _The Exorcist_. You know, I think I'm getting use to this city business." Kureno answered as he put the popcorn in the microwave.

"Whatever. What's it about?" Akito tilted her head.

"I…don't know, but the clerk said it's really scary." Kureno struggled to answer.

"Hmph, we'll see about that." Akito smirked as she put the DVD into the DVD player.


	9. Chapter 9 MoviesBarPolice

"So which one are we watching?" Yuki asked as everyone stood in front of the movie theatre.

"That's for you all to decide! Bye-bye now!" Shigure bid them adieu from the car as he left everyone younger than Ritsu outside the theatre. The young ones were going to see a movie while Shigure, Hatori, Ayame, and Ritsu were going out to a local bar.

"Hey, let's watch the Happening." Haru suggested.

"No, Haru! We can't let the little ones watch an R-rated movie." Yuki pointed out.

"Hey! Just because we're younger than everyone else doesn't make us _little_. We can watch R when we want to." Hiro protested as he stood beside Kisa.

"But, it seems so scary. I…I don't want to watch a scary movie." Kisa mumbled.

"Alright, fine. We'll watch something else." Hiro groaned.

"Kyo! Let's watch the Love Guru!" Kagura jumped up and down.

"No way! That movie looks so retarded!" Kyo yelled. He'd seen the commercial for it on the hotel TV. In the end, they all decided to go see the Indiana Jones movie. It seemed like something that would interest the whole family. The emo, the hyperactive, the shy, the arrogant, the passive, the optimistic, and the confidence-lacking could all enjoy a good action flick.

"C'mon, let's get our seats before the movie starts." Kyo marched towards the theatre.

"Hold it! We have to get popcorn, first!" Kagura pulled him back.

"Yeah, and candy!" Momiji added

"How about we share popcorn, Ms. Honda?" Yuki offered.

"Oh, that's really nice Yuki, but I don't know…" Tohru blushed. Suddenly Kyo, walked up with a large bucket of popcorn.

"C'mon I got the popcorn; now let's get to the theatre." He said.

"Kyo! You're not gonna eat that whole thing by yourself, are you?" Momiji asked gazing at the big bucket.

"No! I was…I was going to ask Tohru if…if she wanted to share." Kyo cheeks turned bright red.

"Oh, thank you so much Kyo! Do you think…Yuki can share with us, too?" Tohru asked.

"Fine, as long as he doesn't hog it all." Kyo groaned.

"I won't since I'm not a filthy pig." Yuki said before feeling like he was getting whacked by a giant hammer. He looked up to see Kagura making an angry face and holding up her fist.

"Oh, dear! I'm very sorry, Kagura! I didn't mean it like that…" Yuki mumbled.

"Eh?! Please everybody, let's just get inside the theatre before the movie starts, okay?!" Tohru muttered as she saw her friend in a chokehold from another friend.

They decided to sit in the back row because the first row always hurt their necks whenever they tried to look up at the screen. There were 5 popcorns total. One for Kyo, Tohru and Yuki, one for Haru and Rin, one for Hiro and Kisa, and Kagura and Momiji each got their own individual popcorns. Momiji also got this mountain of candy. He wasn't planning on finishing all of it during the movie; he actually intended on taking most of it home.

Just down the block, the adults were spending time in the bar. They noticed how the loudest noise in the room was not all the drunken men, but the sound of the TV playing American football.

"Ouch, that looks like it had to hurt." Shigure commented as he saw one player get dog-piled on by the other team. He gently sipped on his beer as he watched Aaya getting surrounded by a bunch of guys.

"What's a pretty little thing like you doing in a dump like this?" One of them flirtatiously asked Ayame.

"Oh, you're too kind sir! Well, you see I'm here with my entire family. We've mainly been doing a bunch of sight-seeing, but I've done quite a bunch of shopping here too!" Ayame chatted with the group.

"Ya got a sister, ma'am?" Another man asked.

"Well, actually I have a little brother. But the boy is so androgynous, people mistake us for sisters! Ah ha ha ha ha!" Ayame giggled and soon had the whole bar laughing. Hatori, who was sitting next to Shigure, rolled his eyes at Aaya and took another puff of his cigarette.

"He's really popular, isn't he, Hari?" Shigure asked his almost-stoned friend.

"Yeah, but this is nothing compared to our old fan club, remember?" Hatori slurred.

"Oh yeah, I remember. Man, they use to stalk us! I remember I caught one trying to break into my locker and steal my gym shorts!" Both Hatori and Shigure started laughing hysterically. Normally, they wouldn't laugh this hard, but they always lighten up after a couple beers and cigarettes. Ritsu was just sitting quietly in the corner gently sipping on his beer. However, despite how careful he was, he still spilt a little bit on the table.

"Ah! I'm so sorry! I'll clean that up right away!" Ritsu shrieked. He ran into the men's restroom, only to be thrown out.

"Hey, lady! This is the _men's_ room!" One of them shouted.

"I'm very sorry! I got carried away and I forgot that people think I'm a woman!" Ritsu shouted. Then people just stopped and stared at him.

"Oh, don't mind her! She's says nonsense when she's drunk!" Shigure covered for him. Everyone returned to their business as Ritsu walked into the ladies' room for a paper towel.

Back at the cinema, the movie had gone about half-way before Kisa needed to go to the restroom.

"Sissy, sissy, I have to go to the bathroom." Kisa whispered to Tohru.

"Okay, Kisa, I'll take you." Tohru smiled sweetly as she took Kisa's hand. As they left, Momiji followed them out of the theatre.

"Wait guys! I'm coming too!" He called out once they were out of the room. As they headed into the girl's room, Tohru noticed Momiji was following them.

"Um, Momiji, this is the ladies' room." Tohru whispered.

"It's okay, Tohru! I've been sneaking into the girls' room since I was five! No one ever notices!" Momiji innocently giggled. A big sweat drop fell down Tohru's forehead as the thought of Momiji being in the girls' room all these years ran through her mind.

Back at the bar, Ayame was still sitting with his admirers before he noticed the big mechanical bull halfway across the bar.

"Oooo, that looks like fun! I'm going to give it a try!" Aaya jumped up and hopped on the mechanical bull as someone put a quarter in.

"Wow, would you look at that?! He's trying the bull!" Shigure pointed as he walked over to watch his friend with Hatori following right behind him. The bull rocked back and forth as Ayame clutch onto the handle tightly. After a few seconds, it threw him off and he went flying. He landed directly on the soft cushions laid out on the floor, and picked himself up.

"Wow that was one wild ride!" He giggled as he rubbed a spot on his head.

"Good try, Aaya. Now it's my turn!" Shigure exclaimed as he jumped up on the bull. As the bull turned one, he was being jerked in all different directions.

"Man! This must be what it feels like to be Isuzu!" Shigure joked about being throttled around by the giant bull. After beating Ayame's record by a few more seconds, Shigure went flying off and landed on the cushiony mat. Now it was Hatori's turn. He put out his cigarette as he climbed on and started the machine. Hatori seemed very focused and he held on for quite a while. After beating both Ayame and Shigure, he flew off the bull as well. However, instead of landing on the mat, he hit his back against the gate of the area.

"Ouch! That's gotta hurt." Shigure said dryly as he went over to help his friend. As Hatori was being helped out by his friends, he noticed Ritsu giving the bull a whirl.

"Wow look at him go!" Ayame cheered as Ritsu clutch onto the bull.

"AAHH! HELP ME! I'M SCARED!" Ritsu screamed as he clutch tighter and tighter to the bull. Before he knew it, he had gone twice as long as Hatori did, and the whole crowd cheered as the bull came to a stop. Ritsu got off and passed out because of the thrill and because of the beer.

"Crap…" Hatori mumbled.

"Don't be a sore loser, Hari. He beat you fair and square!" Ayame lectured.

"No, not that. I just realized we forgot to pick a designated driver."

When the movie was done, everyone walked out of the theatre and waited for their ride to come pick them up.

"I enjoyed the movie! What about you all?" Tohru broke the ice.

"I thought it was pretty good, although I think it's a little weird that an old man can still do most of the stuff he did when he was young." Kyo commented.

"That bug part was creepy!" Kisa shivered.

"That alien at the end was so fake." Hiro said.

"It's a lot better than all the aliens they use to use in the old films." Haru compared.

"I still want to know what happened to that woman at the end." Rin noted.

At the bar, Hatori looked at his watch and realized it was time to pick up the kids.

"C'mon guys! We have to pick up the kids!" He called out to his three cousins.

"Sorry, gentlemen, but I must leave!" Ayame said farewell to the guys at the bar.

"Aw, but I was gonna invite you back to my place!" One of them offered.

"That's such a kind gesture, but I'm afraid I have a lovely girlfriend waiting for me back home!" Ayame proudly stated. All the guys were shocked.

"You mean…you're a lesbian?" One asked.

"Ah ha ha. Of course not! I'm just a lovely man in love with a lovely woman. Toodles!" Ayame explained as left the bar with a dumbfounded crowd. The guys decided that since none of them were in any shape to drive, they would have to walk. They found the large group of kids and teenagers waiting in front of the theatre.

"There you are! We've been waiting for you! Where's the car?" Hiro asked.

"Change of plans, we're walking." Shigure put it short and sweetly as he marched towards the hotel.

Meanwhile, Akito decided that she and Kureno would go out to eat since Kureno could not bring back warm food. They sat in the middle of a McDonalds and Akito was just staring into space. Kureno looked up from his salad. Akito didn't appear to be scared of that movie last night. However, it did unsettle her a bit. It surely scared Kureno. He had to sleep with the lamp on last night.

"Akito? Are you okay?" He asked to the non-responsive Akito. She just sat there, taking a bite every now and then from her burger.

During the walk home, Akito finally spoke.

"Kureno… how…did you break your curse?" Akito asked monotonously.

"Huh? Oh, I don't really know. It just happened." Kureno shrugged. Akito marched up to him and gave him an angry glare.

"So the bird's spirit just decided to pick up and leave?!" Akito started to shout in Kureno's face.

"Yes." Kureno honestly answered. Akito pushed him to the ground.

"You had some priest splash you with holy water! Didn't you?!" Akito falsely accused him as he lay on the ground.

"No I didn't! I swear!" Kureno responded. Akito gave an angry shriek before dragging Kureno to the nearest alley and beating the crap out of him.

"You WANTED to get rid of it! DIDN'T YOU?! You WANTED to get away from ME! You got an exorcism, DIDN'T YOU?!" Akito shouted like a mad man as she pinned him against the wall and punched him in the stomach.

"No! I…didn't do…anything! Stop!" Kureno pleaded as Akito's rage was giving him bruises and cuts all over. He realized now that Akito wasn't scared of the actual possession in the movie; she was scared of getting rid of the spirit at the end. After a few minutes, Kureno could barely stay conscious to Akito's beating. Then suddenly, it all stopped.

He wondered if Akito had calmed down, but he looked up to see Akito being held back by a couple of police men.

"You're under arrest for assaulting this man!" One of them told Akito who was struggling to get free of the officers.

"Unhand me! How _dare_ you touch me! Don't you know who I am?! I'm Akito Sohma! Head of the Sohma household! You have no authority to touch me! LET ME GO!" Akito shouted as she kicked and screamed.

"Please, sir. You have to let him go." Kureno pleaded to the driver.

"I'm sorry sir, but I can't do that. It's a crime to beat up someone in the streets. Those are the rules for _everybody_. Your friend might have to spend a night or two in jail." The officer explained.

"JAIL?!" both Akito and Kureno exclaimed.


	10. Chapter 10 Final Destination

"Buckle up, children

"Buckle up, children! We're off to our final destination, Miami, Florida!" Shigure announced through the megaphone he picked up earlier.

"Another note, we shall not, I repeat, shall _not_, spend the night in a hotel tonight." Ayame added.

"What happened? Did all your shopping make the Sohma estate go bankrupt and now we're sleeping on the streets?" Hiro sarcastically remarked.

"Very funny, Hiro, but you are mistaken. Actually, tonight we camp on the beach!" Ayame corrected.

"Woohoo! Camping!! I love camping! Let's make s'mores! Let's tell scary stories!" Momiji hopped up and down like a, well, bunny.

"Scary…stories?" Tohru whimpered.

"Momiji, we can't tell stories that'll scare Ms. Honda." Yuki placed his hand protectively on Tohru's shoulder.

"Oh, what's the worst that could happen?! She gonna wet her pants or something? Please…"Hiro smirked.

"Now before we actually arrive at the beach, we'll need to pick up camping supplies of course. Tents, sleeping bags, coolers, snacks, the usual…" Hatori added."The beach! Doesn't that sound romantic, Kyo?!" Kagura exclaimed squeezing the life out of Kyo.

"Not if _you're_ there!" Kyo responded gasping for air.

"Wah! Kyo, you're so mean!" Kagura cried as she socked him in the gut.

After picking up the necessary supplies, they headed straight for the shores of Miami.

"Wow! Look at the beautiful water!" Tohru admired.

"Let's go jump waves!" Momiji exclaimed as he pulled Tohru towards the ocean.

"I'm coming, too!" Kisa followed. They rushed into the water and felt the waves push them.

"C'mon Yuki! The water's great!" Tohru called out to him. Yuki, who was setting up his neat little sitting area, took off his shirt and headed towards the others. As soon as he stepped in, he squeaked and jumped back out.

"Eeeek! The water's so _COLD_!" He shivered.

"You'll get used to it!" Momiji shouted back. Yuki held his breath and headed back into the water. He hissed at the freezing sensation, but gradually began to accept the temperature, and he ran out to meet the others.

"Ah, this is very relaxing, isn't it?" Yuki said as he felt the waters brush past him.

Meanwhile, Rin and Haru decided to stay in the sand. After rubbing sun tan lotion on each, Rin just lay around to sun bathe while Haru started building a sand castle. He started making sand walls to surround him from all sides.

"That's a strange-looking sand castle." Rin commented.

"It's not a castle, it's a sand fort." Haru corrected her. He crouched down in his sand fort and waited for Kyo to pass by. When he did, Haru made a ball of wet sand and chucked it a Kyo.

"Hey! What the hell was that for?!" Kyo yelled as his back felt all dirty.

Haru simply replied, "Mud-ball fight." Then, he threw another ball at Kyo. This time, Kyo ducked and started working on his own sand shield while throwing mud-balls at the same time.

"You're throwing sand at each other? Could you two get any more immature?" Hiro asked.

"Hey! He started it!" Kyo defended.

"Oh, Shigure, my greatest desire right now is to take a nice long walk on the beach, but I don't want to go alone!" Ayame said dramatically.

"Never fear, Aaya. I shall walk along with you!" Shigure stood up and proclaimed.

"Oh please, don't make a scene, or else I'm not sharing a tent with you guys tonight." Hatori said as he flipped through the pages of his book. The other two, who appeared to have not heard what he said, started walking on the shore of the beach while holding each other's hand. Hatori just sighed and lay down to take a nap. He'd barely slept at all last night since Ayame and Shigure were trying to memorize every song of the Rocky Horror Show. _I swear if I hear Ayame say he's a sweet transvestite from Transsexual, Transylvania one more time..._ He thought as he drifted off to sleep.

Meanwhile, Ritsu was just relaxing on his little beach towel when he suddenly felt a sudden pain on his leg. He looked over to see a creature biting his calf.

"AHHH! A MONSTER! IT'S COME TO EAT ME! SAVE ME! SAVE MEEEE!" Ritsu jumped up and ran around in circles. Back in the water, they kids noticed that Ritsu was running around hysterical.

"Oh no, he's on the fritz, again." Yuki moaned.

"I think he's in trouble!" Kisa exclaimed.

"Don't worry, Ritsu! I'm coming!" Kagura shouted as she rushed out to help her friend. She found him crying as if his life was in danger.

"FREEZE!" She commanded as she poked Ritsu's sensitive spot. He fell on the ground, unconscious, while Kagura investigated him.

"It appears this was the reason for Ritsu's distress." She said proudly as she plucked the giant crab off of his leg and held it up in the air.

"Wonderful. Brilliant. I don't care." Rin smirked as she continued to bask in the sun's rays. Kagura just made a "hmph" noise and returned to the water with the others.

"Hey, let's go out further so the waves are bigger!" Momiji suggested. They walked further and further until the water was up to their shoulders.

"Incoming!" Momiji called out when a giant wave came their way. It toppled over them and buried them deep into the water. One by one, everyone emerged from the watery bed, everyone except for Tohru.

"Whew! That's was so awesome! Do it again!" Kagura cheered.

"Wait, where's Ms. Honda?" Yuki noted. A few seconds after he said that, Tohru emerged from the water spitting out the salty water in her mouth. Unfortunately, she didn't see Yuki standing where she was spitting.

"Oh my gosh! I am SO sorry, Yuki! I didn't see you there! I'm such an idiot! If I had looked before I sprayed I wouldn't have…" Tohru apologized loudly.

"It's fine. Don't worry about it, Ms. Honda." Yuki said as he had said one hundred times before.

As the sun began to set on the beach, everyone gathered around as Ritsu tried to light the campfire. He was having a little trouble with the matches.

"Sometime before summer break ends, please." Hiro said sarcastically.

"He's trying the best that he can!" Kagura shot back. Ritsu tried striking the match a little harder than usual, and he was surprised and scared when the match lit. He screamed and dropped it so that extinguished on the sand.

"Great! Now we need another match!" Kyo groaned.

"AH! I'M SO SORRY! I'VE JUST WASTED ONE OF SHIGURE'S PRECIOUS MATCHES! PLEASE FORGIVE ME! I SHOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TOUCH ANYTHING OF YOURS ANYMORE!!" Ritsu freaked as tears burst from his eyes.

"Ritsu, chill. I have plenty more." Shigure said as he lit another match and made the campfire.

"Yes! Now we can make s'mores!" Momiji cheered as he ran to the circle with the crackers, sticks, chocolate, and marshmallows.

"Indeed, let us all join together for the toasting of s'mo-OW!" Ayame twitched as he cried in pain.

"What's the matter, Ayame?" Tohru asked concerned.

"He forgot to put on sunscreen before his walk." Hatori answered dryly as he pulled out some sunburn lotion from his first-aid kit.

All the way in New York, Akito was being held prisoner at the county jail. She was scratching the paint off the walls with her nails as she crouched down in the corner.

"Those stupid officers don't know who they're dealing with. I'll make them pay. Oh, I assure you they will pay."

"That's not the kind of thing that'll get you out of here anytime soon." Kureno said.

"I don't like it in here, Kureno. How long do I have to stay in this damn pen?!" Akito growled.

"I didn't understand them very well, but I think they said a week." Kureno mumbled.

"Can't you tell them something to make them release me sooner?!" Akito pleaded.

"I would, but I don't know how to plead your case in English." Kureno explained.

"私は屠殺する! 私はあなたの睾丸を切り、オオカミにそれらに与える!" Akito cursed in Japanese as she grabbed Kureno's collar and shook him up.


	11. Chapter 11 Baseball

"So why again are we here at 'Academy'?" Hiro asked.

"Equipment! We're gonna play baseball today!" Kagura answered.

"Ok people, for our baseball game we need bats, helmets, balls, gloves and bases! We'll have a scavenger hunt for each of these items! The timer starts in three…two…!" Ayame announced.

"No way. Let's not create chaos in the store please. Let's just get what we need and go." Hatori stopped him.

"Aw, Hatori! You never let me have any fun! Fine, I'll get the balls and the bases, but everyone else must challenge each other for the best glove, helmet and bat!" Ayame corrected himself.

"Hey look! This looks like a good helmet!" Tohru beamed as she wedged her head into a helmet.

"Um, Tohru, that's a football helmet." Yuki pointed out.

"Eh? Is it really? Oh, well…it doesn't matter, right? It'll still work?" Tohru stammered.

"Yeah, but you'll look like a complete idiot." Kyo teased.

"She'll be an adorable idiot though!" Momiji laughed.

"I don't know if there's a real baseball helmet that's gonna fit her big head." Hiro wisecracked.

"My head isn't that big, is it?" Tohru whimpered as she scrunched her shoulders together.

"Hiro! Why do you have to be so mean?" Kisa asked.

"What?! They were just calling her an idiot a moment ago!" Hiro defended.

"We were just kidding." Momiji responded.

"Well who said I wasn't? Geez, can't anyone take a joke around here?" Hiro crossed his arms.

"Well? Is my head really that big?" Tohru asked again as it seemed everyone ignored her question.

"Of course not, Ms. Honda. Your head is perfect." Yuki answered her sweetly as he brushed her forehead. Hiro just pointed to his tongue.

"This helmet is haunted. There are voices in it telling me very strange things." Haru walked by and changed the subject.

"Well, if it's bothering you, just take the helmet off." Rin said.

"No."

"Why not?"

"Two reasons why. First of all, I like these voices, they're friendly. Second, I can't. This helmet is stuck." Haru explained.

"Oh no. Hold still, I'll help you get it off." Rin sighed as she tugged on the helmet, but it wasn't going to budge. She continued to struggle as everyone else just watched in amusement.

"Don't just stand there. Help!" Rin barked after about a minute. Tohru immediately stood up and marched over to Rin.

"Try to pull the helmet off while I pull from behind." Rin instructed.

"Ay-ay, sir!"

"Don't call me sir."

"Right." Tohru took Rin's position at Haru's head.

"I think my brain has a heartbeat." Haru commented.

"Hold on, we'll get you out in a second. Alright, on three. One…two…three!" Rin counted as she tugged as hard as she could on Haru's body.

"I think it's coming loose!" Tohru cheered hopefully.

"Good. Ok, one more time. One…two…three!"

Pop! Haru's head came flying out as he fell back and landed on top of Rin. Tohru also fell backwards and bumped into Kyo, making him transform.

"Oh wonderful, just perfect! Please don't tell me somebody saw us!" Kyo yelled in his angry cat form.

"Nope, you're clear." Haru said as he looked outside the aisle.

"Just get me and my clothes to the bathroom before I change back!" Kyo ordered.

"Yes! Right away!" Tohru said obediently as she picked up Kyo and his clothes and headed straight for the restroom.

As they walked away, Momiji looked at Haru and started holding in a laugh.

"What is it? What's so funny, bunny?" Haru asked.

"Your hair!" He blurted out. Haru rolled his eyes.

"Yes, we all know it's black with white on top…"

"No, not that! The shape! You've got helmet hair!" He explained giggling as Haru looked into the nearest shiny surface. Indeed, his hair appeared to be squished in the middle and some of the spikes were pointing in the wrong direction. He looked at himself blankly as he tried to fix it while everyone else laughed.

After the helmet episode, the group looked for good bats and gloves.

"You're gonna need a bat that's not too heavy for you, but will still give a good impact on that ball. Here, try this one." Kyo instructed as he put a sleek black bat into Tohru's hands. Her arms immediately shot down like anchors, and pulled her down with them.

"Um, this one's a little too heavy." She noted as she struggled to pull her hands from underneath the bat. Kyo picked it up and replaced it with a little pink bat.

"Here. This one should be better." He said as he helped her up. Tohru held up her arms in swinging position and swung the little bat, almost hitting Kyo.

"Ack! Be careful! You almost hit me!" Kyo shouted as Tohru looked at him embarrassed.

"Sorry! On the bright side though, I think this bat works for me!" Tohru cheered.

"I can't move my fingers in this glove." Ritsu said as he stuck in hand into the baseball glove.

"You're not supposed to, silly! It's basically supposed to be a giant hand to catch the ball." Kagura explained.

"Oh…" Ritsu sighed.

Once they got all the materials needed, they headed off to the park to play ball.

"How are we going to divide into teams if there are an odd number of people here?" Yuki asked.

"I'm not going to play. I'll be the score keeper." Hatori answered.

"Alright, let's divide the teams. Ayame and I shall take turns picking teammates!" Shigure announced.

"Hey! Why do you guys get to decide?!" Hiro complained.

"Because we're the oldest, that's why!" Ayame bragged.

"Everybody line up horizontally! Aaya, you choose first." Shigure ordered.

"Yay! I choose…my darling brother, Yuki!" Ayame proclaimed.

"No."

"C'mon Yuki, I choose you! Now, please bring your graceful presence right here at my side." Ayame commanded. Yuki groaned and dragged himself to Ayame's side.

"Now it's my turn…Hm, Isuzu. Come on down!" Shigure called out.

"Now I choose the wonderful princess, Tohru!"

"Kagura!"

"Momiji!"

"Kisa!"

"Hiro!"

"Ritsu!"

"Haru!" Ayame called out his last team member.

"Alright, I guess that means I get Kyo." Shigure sighed.

"Hey! Why was I picked _last_?!" Kyo shouted.

"Oh, don't be such a whiner, you stupid cat." Yuki said.

"Don't worry, Kyo! I'm sure that they were just saving the best for last!" Tohru said in an attempt to cheer up the pissed-off Kyo.

Ayame and Shigure flipped a coin to see who would bat first. Ayame won, so Shigure's team put on their gloves and took their stations. Kagura, Kisa, and Kyo took 1st, 2nd, and 3rd base respectively. Shigure took outfield while Ritsu was the catcher and Rin was the pitcher. Rin focused on her target spot as Ayame stepped onto the plate. She aimed and she threw a fast one. Ayame swung but missed as he span around in circles.

"Um, strike one. I'm so sorry…" Ritsu mumbled.

"It's alright Ritsu; I missed it fair and square. I'll just try again!" Ayame said. Then he held up his bat and got back into swinging position.

"Alright, Isuzu! Give it to me!"

Rin threw another fast pitch, and Aaya missed it again.

"Strike two."

She threw one more, and he almost hit it, but he still missed.

"Strike…three. You're…out." Ritsu muttered.

"This is not the end! You have not seen the last of me! I shall return!" Ayame exclaimed.

"Yeah yeah, just get off the plate, snake! It's my turn to bat." Hiro shoved his older cousin off the batting plate and made his stance. Rin pitched, and Hiro struck the ball with a mighty force. It flew out towards Shigure's area. He tried to catch it as a popfly, but it bounced off of his glove and landed on the ground. He picked it up and managed to throw it to Kyo before Hiro got past 2nd.

Next up to bat was Haru, who was wearing a helmet that actually fit him this time. He and Isuzu stared each other down before she pitched the ball. He hit it, but he started running towards 3rd base!

"No, Haru! You're going the wrong way!" Yuki called out. Haru soon realized his mistake, and headed back the right way. Even with that little error, he managed to get a single, and left Hiro on third base. Next up to bat was…Tohru.

She gulped as she saw the determination in Rin's eyes. They intimidated her a little bit. She held her breath and held up the bat. When she was ready, Rin made the pitch. Instead of swinging, Tohru shrieked and ducked.

"Strike one…" Ritsu mumbled.

"Tohru, you're supposed to hit the ball!" Momiji reminded her.

"Oh, right. Sorry, I guess I lost my nerve a little…" Tohru said nervously. Rin threw another one that flew right past Tohru before she had a chance to react.

"Strike two…"

"Wow! The ball is really fast!" Tohru exclaimed the obvious.

"That's sorta the point." Rin responded sarcastically. As she threw the final ball, Tohru followed the ball's path with her eyes and swung at it. To everyone surprise, it went flying out into the outfield. It zoomed past Shigure so he had to run after it. Tohru used her powerful little legs to charge past all three bases. It came down to a sudden death moment where Ritsu was about to tag her with the ball and Tohru came sliding in for home. She slid and landed on the base right before Ritsu could touch her.

"Woohoo! Go Tohru! It's a homerun!" Momiji cheered as he jumped up and down.

After a long grueling game, the scored ended 13 to 12, with Ayame's team as the winner.

"DAMMIT! I was so close to beating that damn rat!" Kyo yelled.

"Aw, don't be such a sore loser, Kyo! You played well." Kagura tried to cheer him up.

"But if I'd played better, I would have beaten him! Him and that stupid snake!" Kyo pounded the side of the car with his fist.

When they arrived in their hotel rooms, the first thing Momiji did was turn on the TV.

"Momiji, give me the remote! _Grey's Anatomy_ is on!" Kagura ordered. She'd seen that show a few days ago, and had grown to like it.

"Aw, but I'm watching _Cops_ right now!" He whined.

"Later, HAND OVER THE REMOTE!" Kagura forced it out of Momiji's hand by pouncing on him.

"Kagura, wait! Look!" Momiji cried out and stopped her from changing the channel. The image on the screen caught both of their attentions. They turned up the volume to hear it better.

"_Ok, so we're here on the evening streets of New York where there were reports of two Asians in a brawl in this alley outside a McDonalds. Alright, now I think I see them…Ah, yeah, there they are."_ The cop reported as he drove to the scene of the crime.

_"I'm confused, is that man being beat by a man or a woman? I honestly can't tell."_ Then, two of the cops jumped out of the car and pulled the Asian "man" in the magenta kimono off of the other Asian man with dark red hair.

_"You're under arrest for assaulting this man!"_

_"Unhand me! How _dare_ you touch me! Don't you know who I am?! I'm Akito Sohma! Head of the…"_

"AKITO!!" Momiji and Kagura screamed.

"And the other guy must be Kureno!" Momiji added. They immediately rushed out of the room and banged on the other two rooms.

"Everybody! Come quick! It's really important!" Momiji yelled as he banged on the doors.

"Momiji, what is the matter with you?!" Hatori asked as the rest of the family gathered into the hallway.

"It's super urgent! Akito and Kureno are on TV!" Kagura shouted as she led everyone to the television set. Right now it showed Akito already in the police car, trying to break the windows with the handcuffs.

_"Hey! Stop! Don't break those! You'll have to pay for them!"_ The cop warned.

"_I can pay for them. I have a lot of money! LET ME OUT OF THIS F#ING CAR!" _Akito barked.

"_Hey, watch your mouth. Why were you assaulting that man?" _The cop asked calmly for he'd seen many foul-mouthed kooks in this job.

_"It's none of your business!"_

_"How do you know that man?"_

_"He's my cousin! It's personal family business!"_

_"Well, you're going to have to deal with this down at the station."_

_"I'm a very important person! I'm a _needed _person! I don't have the time to be locked behind bars! I'm not that damn cat!!"_

_"Cat?"_

_"I mean…ugh, never mind. That's just more family business."_ It was easy to see all this arguing and fighting was draining Akito of his energy. The cop that was driving spoke into his walkie-talkie.

_"Yeah, we have an Asian…18 or 19 year old…"_

_"I'm 20!"_

_"An Asian twenty-year-old female…"_

_"I am a MALE!"_

_"An Asian 20-year-old male here who's being charged for an account of assault, and possible animal abuse…" _(BLIP) Hatori turned the TV off.

Everyone was too shocked to say a word. The room was completely silent until Rin spoke up.

"Akito…came to America?" She asked. She wouldn't have believed it if she hadn't had just watched it before her very eyes.

"And he's…he's in the slammer…" Haru added.

"Everybody! Pack your things! We have to get him out of there!" Hatori ordered looking more serious than normal.

"Aw, why can't we just leave him there? Maybe incarceration will straighten him up a bit." Kyo suggested.

"Because, right now he's very scared and very alone! The longer he's in there, the more hell he'll unleash when he gets out! And whether you like it or not, he's your God _and_ your family! We have no choice but to help him!" Hatori explained to him in a very harsh tone. As soon as everyone came back from their misplaced states of mind, they headed for the next flight to New York City.

* * *

A/N: The next chapter is the last. Just a little heads up for you.


	12. Chapter 12 Homecoming

A/N: I'm really sorry it took months for the conclusion! Honestly, I all of a sudden lost my writing drive and I didn't get it back until a while ago. At least I didn't abandon the story all together!

* * *

As soon as they landed in the New York Airport, the Sohmas headed as fast as they could to the county jail. This was nearly impossible because the place was jam tight, and they couldn't move an inch without bumping into somebody.

"This is bad! This is bad! This is BAD!!" Ritsu shouted as he lost his nerve.

"With so many people, we'll change for sure!" Yuki stated as he started biting his nails. Tohru greatly disliked seeing the family so worried; she had to do something! She had to remember something, some flaw in the curse that would let them pass through peacefully. She thought back until it finally popped into her tiny, yet sufficient brain.

"The sheets!" Tohru cried out.

"Don't worry, Tohru. The maids back at the hotel will clean the sheets we used!" Momiji said thinking she was talking about how she didn't get to wash the soft hotel sheets.

"No, Momiji, that's not what I meant. Although, now that you mentioned it…"

"Don't stray from your train of thought! Why the heck did you yell 'sheets'?" Hiro asked rudely.

"Oh, right. Well you see, one time Kyo and I were able to embrace without transforming because the bed sheets were in between us!" Tohru explained a little too loudly. Everyone had a giant animated sweat drop fall from their foreheads.

"My, my…Maiden Tohru and Lucky Kyo in between the sheets! How romantic! Ahahahahaha!" Ayame shouted.

"Sounds like something I could use in my next novel!" Shigure added.

"Oh, stop it you two. I'm sure that's not what she meant." Hatori told his friends.

"HEY! WE DIDN'T DO NOTHING!!" Kyo exploded in front of everyone. Once again, the Sohmas had managed to bring the attention of dozens of Americans to themselves.

"I don't understand. What did I say that made everyone so uncomfortable?" Tohru asked naively.

"You insinuated that you and Kyo…" Rin started explaining to her child-minded friend.

"…had slept together." Haru finished Rin's sentence.

"EEEHHH?? NO NO!! That's not what I meant! You see I was doing the laundry and I was hanging the sheets up to dry and then Kyo came and started asking about my father and…" Tohru tried to explain with an even dew of sweat on her face.

"Whatever! What's the point of this anyway?!" Hiro asked.

"She wants us to wear sheets so we don't transform!" Kagura put it bluntly.

"If Sissy says it works, we should try it." Kisa said.

"Here Tohru, take my credit card, let's experiment to see if what you claim worked between you and Kyo will prove effective on us. Go get a dozen bed sheets or curtains and see if they'll work." Hatori instructed as he sent Tohru off to the airport shops with his credit card. While she went shopping, everyone else tried to avoid being bumped into by other people. About half an hour later, she returned with the sheets.

"I'm sorry, but all they had was pink! I hope you don't mind." Tohru sulked as she distributed sheets to everyone.

"Well, beggars can't be choosers, I guess." Shigure commented as he put on his sheet like a toga.

"BOO! Look everybody I'm a ghost!" Momiji squealed as he pulled his sheets over his head.

"Momiji, this is no time to be messing around. We're here to bail out Akito, remember?" Hatori reminded him.

"Seriously, what is so bad about Akito being in jail? If he broke the law, he should pay the consequences!" Rin protested.

"We can't help it. Our spirits are telling us to help him. Plus, he'd probably break out eventually and then unleash his wrath on us for not helping him." Shigure answered. Rin just groaned.

Honestly, when the Sohmas finished putting on their sheets, they looked like complete dorks. However, this humiliation proved fruitful. They must've bumped into several members of the opposite gender, but there were no transformations.

"Wow, Tohru. It actually worked." Kagura said as she pushed through to the exit of the airport. Then they took a cab to the county jail.

"Ok guys, no one mention this sheet idea to Akito. If he knows there is a flaw in the curse, heads will roll and Isuzu will go out the window again." Shigure said.

"HEY!" Rin shouted, but she got distracted from Shigure's comment when she saw her god lying on the benches in the cell. Outside the cell was Kureno just sitting casually and playing with his thumbs. As soon Akito saw her family, she jumped up and pressed her body to the cell door.

"Aha! I told you, Kureno! I told you the family would come looking for me! They always come to me!" Akito cheered rather proudly despite the fact she had not bathed in days and she had a bruise on her left cheek that was a gift from a cellmate.

"Don't worry; I'll take care of the bail." Hatori said as he turned to talk to the officers. After a long conversation and a large payment, the guards unlocked the cell doors and let Akito free. Kureno was in front to greet her, but she pushed him aside and ran to Hatori.

"Oh Hatori, it was terrible! The food was disgusting; the other inmates had no respect for me at all, and look at my cheek! I was attacked by a wretched woman! I just want to go home and take a nice bath!" Akito complained as she hugged Hatori tightly.

"Aki! How lovely to see you!" Shigure greeted as he tried to get near Akito, but she pushed him away.

"Don't touch me! I'm still mad at you for lying about this trip!" Akito yelled. She turned to look at all her precious zodiac.

"What happened to all of you?! Rin, what kind of earrings are those? And Kyo, why does your shirt have a number on it? I hope you all enjoyed your little vacation because we're going home right now!" Akito lectured as she marched out of the building with everyone following her.

On the plane home, she made everyone sit in coach except for herself, Kureno, Hatori and Yuki, who were all in first class. However, Yuki excused himself to the bathroom in order to sneak into the coach section with everyone else.

"I hope you had fun Ms. Honda." Yuki smiled at Tohru.

"Oh, yes! I had a lot of fun!" Tohru exclaimed.

"Check out all the pictures I got! There's some from LA, and Vegas, and here's Haru in the cowboy hat when we were in Texas, and here's our beach trip!" Kagura reviewed the pictures of everything they did with Tohru.

"My word, Shigure, what is that you have in your hands?" Ayame asked.

"It's a recording of Akito's arrest on TV. I'm going to show it to Ren when we get home!" Shigure exclaimed as he laughed mischievously.

Back in first class, Akito just stared at the clouds while mumbling to herself.

"Stupid jail, stupid food, the whole country is just stupid. When is Yuki getting back from the bathroom? Geez, please don't tell me he has a stomach virus."

Kureno just listened to her rambling and sat quietly as he waited to return to his small comfortable place at the Sohma Main House. All of a sudden, he noticed something tucked into Akito's kimono. He looked closely to see it was a DVD, he looked even closer to see the title of the movie and the director: QUENTIN TARANTINO'S KILL BILL V.1+2. He raised his eyebrows at this; maybe there was something that had caught Akito's interest after all.


End file.
